The Cost of Happiness
by LanaLang6410
Summary: Ever since she entered the hospital, Beatrice has known one thing. She's not crazy. Ms. Matthews has been her doctor and therapist for the longest time and always made sure that Beatrice knew her place. When a new doctor takes her place, Beatrice finally has some hope that she'll be let out of this prison-like hospital. Slow-burn. Rated T for language. Back from Hiatus!
1. Chapter 1

I had a dream last night. No therapist. No psychiatric ward. No doctors. I was flying through the sky, not weighted down by anyone or anything. I wasn't considered crazy. Nobody told me I was not perfect, nobody told me that I was going to get better.

"Beatrice," says a cheery voice breaking off my thoughts. _Ms. Matthews._ Ms. Matthews is my doctor and therapist. They say that she's one of the best in the field and top of her class. But she's not. She has to be the worst of the worse. When I say or do something intelligent or show signs of getting better, she has to perform tests, painful tests. I've learned to keep my mouth shut around her.

"I have great news!" She says. I tilt my head at her. A cunning smile forms on her lips as she noticed my docile behavior. She likes it when I act dumb and oblivious. I think she likes power a little too much.

"You are officially 24 and have been keeping up _very_ good behavior," I honestly no use in this information whatsoever. My age doesn't matter at this point. I could be 90 but they still wouldn't let me out. But I do agree that I've learned not to say too little or too much. When I first got here when I was 10, I was pretty good about staying quiet. When I turned 14 I realized exactly what they thought I was. I screamed that I wasn't crazy for hours. That only made them give me sedatives to keep me down. I'm pretty sure it also convinced the whole team that I was crazy.

"How does that affect me?" I say. It's one of the lines I can repeat as many times as I want. I keep a mental list of what I've said time and time again to make sure Ms. Matthews can't see that I'm getting smarter.

"Well I have some good news and some sad news," I don't reply.

"Good news is that I have a special gift for you and you're being moved,"

"Moved?" I say a little too quickly. I've been in this room for quite a while. I've grown quite fond of it but I'd love to get out of here.

"Yes, to a much better room. But, there is sad news. I will no longer be your major doctor. You were lucky when you first got _me_ as your doctor. But, you've come a long way, Beatrice," _Finally, I got this power-hungry narcissist off my back._

"Who will be-" She cuts me off.

"A doctor. He will talk to you every day and check up on you every night. I tried to keep you as my patient but the hospital made some changes," she says. I don't want a doctor who's a guy. I'm not sexist or anything but if I really am a little crazy, I don't want to be taken advantage of.

"Anyways, today's our last day today and I thought we should talk a little,"

"Ok,"

"So, I know it took a while for you to open up to me but I can promise that you'll be in good hands,"

"Ok,"

"I have a few surprises for you because of how well you've behaved and how much you've cooperated over these last few months. Would you like to see them?," she says with a smile. _Fake_. I nod my head. She unlocks my door and looks at me expectantly. I immediately get up and follow behind her. I'm surprised when she doesn't grab my hand to lead me like she usually does.

"I trust that you'll follow me," I nod and don't try anything. I tried running once but I didn't get far. I was chased and knocked out.

"You _can't_ keep me here! I'm not crazy! This isn't a hospital! It's a fucking prison!" I hear a strong male voice yell as he's being pulled back. I stop walking to stare. He has dark skin and even darker eyes. He can't be any old than me and he probably hasn't been here too long. I watch as the men hold him back, bringing a cloth over his mouth and nose as he struggles against them. I watch as he goes limp in their arms after a few seconds of struggling.

"Beatrice!" I hear Ms. Matthews's voice, strict and with hints of bitterness and annoyance. I immediately look away and catch up with her. After a little more walking, we reach a room. She opens the door to reveal a slightly larger room. The walls are painted blue, rather than the white I was used to. The bed looked softer and the pillow looked plusher.

"Thank you," I whisper.

"Beatrice, no need to say thank you. You've been so cooperative and so easy to work with. A treat was in order. Just remember, this can be taken away too," she says, ending with an evil smile. I smile at her, not a real smile, but it's enough to placate her.

"I'll leave you to explore your new room," She says with a smile. It wasn't very big and there wasn't much to explore, but it was a definite upgrade. I wait for the lock to click as she locked my door from the outside before jumping towards the desk. Usually, the doctor would sit there and take notes or do something like that. I snoop around a little bit, trying to get a feel for the room. At least half an hour passes and I almost lose track of time. Then, I hear the lock click and I jump back to the bed and try to look as comfortable as possible. The door swings open to reveal a man. _Who is he? Why is he here?_ He doesn't look familiar. He's tall, at least 6'3 and muscular. _He wants to hurt me._

" ! !" I scream over and over again. It's sad that I'm calling her name for help. What else can I do? I frantically look for the emergency button which is usually located next to the bed. My screaming obviously surprises him because he starts to take a few steps back.

"I'm not going to hurt you," he says, trying to soothe me. I finally find the button and press it.

" ! !" I continue to scream. A few seconds later, Ms. Matthews comes rushing with doctors by her side, looking between me and the unfamiliar man.

"Dr. Eaton! I expected better from you. You should know that Beatrice is very sensitive. I was supposed to introduce you to her," Ms. Matthews scolds. My breathing returns to normal after I take a few deep breaths.

"She wasn't supposed to be in the room this early," he fires back.

"Anyways, you gave Beatrice quite a scare so let's put this behind us and start anew," says.

"I'm Dr. Eaton. What's your name?" he says taking a step forward towards me. Why would he ask? He already knows my name.

"Is that one hard for you? That's fine," he says gently. With her clipboard and pen, Ms. Matthews smiles with a perfect row of teeth and says,

"Well, I'll let you introduce yourselves and get to know each other. _But_ this was _supposed_ to be _my_ day with Beatrice," She says with annoyance before finally walking out.

"It's nice to meet you, Beatrice. Is there anything you'd like to ask me?" he says.

"What's wrong with me?" I say. The words just tumble out of my mouth without me properly thinking about them. For a second, I think he's going to scold me as Ms. Matthews would've. But, he doesn't. He thinks for a while, clearly thinking over the question.

"Nothing," he responds. I take the answer and decide to bite back my response.

"So, your name is Beatrice, right?" I nod.

"Do you have any nicknames?" he asks. I want to believe that he's genuinely asking but I know he's getting paid to do this. I remember I used to have a nickname. Then they took me away and I was known as Beatrice.

"I-I used to be called Tris," I stammer in barely above a whisper.

"Would you like to play a game?" I shake my head no.

"What would you like to do?" he asks. _I want to get out of here. I want to walk. I want to see the bright sky. I want to see the sun. I want to call my mom._ I shrug.

"Hmm, I'll let you get some rest and I'll be back tonight," he makes his way to the door, about to close it behind him. Then, I think of something he might be able to do.

"Wait," I say. But it's too late, the door has already been closed and locked. This room has no source of entertainment so it's going to be a long wait. I make a mental list of everything in the room.

 _1 bed_

 _1 bedside table_

 _1 desk (not for me)_

 _4 blue walls_

 _2 cabinets (probably with clothes and hospital gowns_

 _1 emergency button_

 _1 restroom button (I press it so someone can escort me to the restroom)_

 _1 small bucket_

 _1 therapist call button_

 _1 food button (only can be used 4 times a day unless you want just water. Breakfast, Lunch, Snack, Dinner, and endless water)_

 _1 small drawing (probably made by a teenager, judging by the artistic skill)_

 _1 Light switch_

I study the drawing for a little bit. It features three ravens flying freely out of a cage. _Maybe the artist is from the ward._

Next, I check the bedside table. I open up the first drawer to find four children's book _When I'm feeling sad. When I'm feeling angry. When I'm feeling nervous. When I'm feeling scared._ All by Tracey Moroney. I guess it's better than nothing. I remember how to read. Ms. Matthews used to bring me books to monitor my reading ability. When I was 12 she brought me a book about a wizard boy, only the first book. I wish I could've finished it, it was a great book. The wizard boy was rescued from a negligent family and brought into the great wizarding world. My stomach rumbles slightly but I ignore it and lay down on the bed. I lean over and flick the light switch, something new. The blankets are softer and warmer. The mattress is strong. The pillow is so, so soft. I pull the blanket up to my neck and slowly start to drift off.

I dream that I'm with my mother. She's wearing her soft perfume, just enough to be one spray at most. She runs into a garden maze, beckoning me to follow her. I follow her, smiling at the feeling of the warmth of the sun and the warm summer breeze. I quickly walk to try to catch up with my mother. Every time I turn, I can just barely see her. The garden is suddenly gone and I can feel my mother embracing me. My eyes are shut until I feel myself being pulled away. I look at my mother's face and she tightly grasps my hands, trying to keep her hold on me. A man walks up to her and whispers something to her, causing her to loosen her grip on my hands, and finally, let go.

"No! No! No! I'm not crazy! You can't take me away," I scream. I'm suddenly thrown into a room, hearing whispers. _I'm not crazy._

"Divergent," I hear Ms. Matthews whisper.

I shoot up, awake. _I can't even escape them in my sleep._ I sit up in the bed and stare at the wall in the dark. I don't how much time has passed, just that I don't want to sleep right now. I remember how I called Ms. Matthews when I had needed help and the mere thought sickened me. _Who else is going to care just a bit?_ An abrupt knock at snaps me out of my thoughts. I quickly lie down and pretend to sleep, shutting my eyes as the door opens. Sometimes, if they think I'm sleeping, they leave and I don't have to talk to them.

"Beatrice, I'm going to need you to wake up. You need to eat," My new doctor gently tries shaking me a little, not too roughly. Eating does sound nice at the moment. I didn't have lunch and only had a little breakfast. I take my time opening my eyes and adjusting myself up. Then, I finally look at him.

"I'm not hungry," I lie. It's the lamest thing I can think of, but it's something. He sighs, places down the tray, and pulls a chair into the room, sitting down next to my bed.

"According to these charts, over the last few months, you have continued to lose weight. In January you were 114 pounds and now, August, you're 109 pounds. You're only 5'5 and..." I tune out as he talks. He kind of reminds me of my brother. Always relating back to charts and explaining things fully. Caleb was smart and a huge nerd but he was always more popular than me. I enjoy the bittersweet analogy between the two for a moment before I notice Dr. Eaton looking at me expectantly. _What did he ask me?_

"Huh?" I reply dumbly. _One good thing about being thrown here is that the people are required to be patient._

"Do you care about your health?" He asks. _If you were taken away and thrown into lifeless prison would you care about your health?_ If only I could say what I wanted to say. Instead, I just nod.

"Then eat," he says, getting up and grabbing the tray. He puts it on my lap and looks at me, waiting. I just stare at the food blankly.

"Can you talk to me then?" I take a closer look at him, the bags under his eyes, how his nearly perfect suit has been crumpled since morning, and how his patience is starting to run thin.

"Ok," I say. I don't want to be 'demoted' or get in trouble for not being easy to work with.

"I see you've been looking at these books," he says pointing to the books on my table. I nod.

"Did you read them?" I shake my head.

"Do you like reading?" I nod my head.

"What else do you like to do?"

"What else can I do? I'm only allowed to sit in this room, read, talk with the same person, two if I'm lucky, like twice a day, be escorted to the restroom, and be escorted to the shower. If you didn't notice, they don't allow patients to have many hobbies here," I replied bitterly. I've forgotten how to breathe when talking and I haven't said that much in a long time.

"Progress, progress," he mutters quietly. It isn't condescending, just analytical.

"What makes you talk more?" He asks. I shrug, back to my usual reply. He gets up and places the clipboard on the desk and walks back to me.

"Are you happy here?" He asks after a few moments of silence. _No._

"I'm not sad," I say. This isn't a lie. I'm not happy, but I'm not sad either.

"That's not the question,"

"But it's my answer,"

"Eat," I shake my head no.

"Please?" I lift the fork and take the tiniest bite of food.

"A little more?" I take a slightly bigger bite. I'm really hungry but I don't feel like eating.

"You skipped lunch. You must be hungry," he declares. I shake my head no. Then, as if on cue, my stomach growls.

"I'll take that as a yes," I take a normal-sized bite and glare at him. At least he's not as annoying at Ms. Matthews when it comes down to eating. I've heard the 'Beatrice, I am heavily disappointed in you. Many people in this world starve every year and you refuse to eat the food that has been graciously put in front of you' a thousand times. I hear a buzz and my eyes immediately go to Dr. Eaton. It's his phone. He takes it out and glances at it.

"Excuse me, I'll be right back. Please eat while I'm gone. I'll be back." he says and then he grabs his clipboard and walks out of the room and locks. I wonder who's texting him. _Maybe his mother? No, his father. He seems cool enough to have friends. Maybe he has a wife? Children? That must be nice._ I take a big bite and chew my food carefully. I eat quickly finishing half of my food quickly. _Guess I was really hungry._ After about ten minutes, I hear the familiar click of a lock and look at the door. _Who were you talking to?_ He looks at me surprised and it takes me a few seconds to realize I said that out loud. _Great job. Now I've crossed the line._

"No one important," he says, smoothing out his shirt awkwardly. He glances at my tray and smiles.

"Keep on eating. It's giving you energy," he says. We sit in silence as I finish my tray.

"Great. Well, I'll take the tray. Tomorrow is testing, I take it that you know what to do. Good night," he says, and lets himself out. The lock clicks and I sigh. I get up and study the cabinet. I pull out a nightgown. I change out of my clothes and fold them neatly and keep them on the desk. Something blue catches my eyes underneath the cabinet. _A logo._ I get on my knees and tilt my head, trying to read the bottom of the cabinet. _Eaton's Hospital for the Sick._

 _Was the man I'm talking to the owner? Maybe it's a coincidence._ Scenarios cross against my mind. _Maybe my family has signed something allowing the hospital to put me to sleep and die a 'painless' death. Maybe I'm being tested to see if they can let me out._ I smiled at that thought. Dozens of thoughts flow through my mind, good and bad. I choose one of the first ones I thought of, _He's doing a final test to release me and name me as a perfectly normal human. I have to convince him that I'm normal._ Hope is a dangerous thing for me to have considering how many years I've been here.

 **A/N: Next Chapter? Probably in a week or two depending on some things. My old shared my open up. I don't know when but it probably will. Please Review.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Backstory (as requested)**

 _~BEATRICE~ AGE SIX (and three quarters) :_

" _Beatrice, honey, can you please explain why your teacher wanted to talk to me this afternoon," my mother asks softly._

" _I didn't do anything!" I say, my cheeks red._

" _Beatrice," she says, her tone stronger._

" _I punched Molly," I admit, "in the face," Shock and disappointment crosses over my mother's face. I've never been a great liar._

" _Why?" She asks, pulling me up on her lap._

" _She called me and Christina stupid. Then she ripped up Will's homework," I mumble, ashamed._

" _Sweety, you know how to handle situations like that. Tell the teacher. You're not being a tattletale, you're standing up for yourself. I expect you to write an apology to Molly and her parents,"_

" _But mom-" I protest, but she gives me a look that silences me._

" _No buts Beatrice. Why don't you help Caleb prepare dinner?" she says, gently embracing me. Disappointment outlines her face but forgiveness fills it. I just nod, feeling embarrassed._

" _What's wrong, Bea,?" asks Caleb as I enter the kitchen._

" _Mom found out," I say, taking out some frozen peas._

" _Oh. Did you get in trouble?"_

" _I have to write Molly and her parents an apology," I sigh. I take out a pot and dump all of the peas in the small bag in._

" _I can help you write. I owe you one anyway," he says, cracking a smile. This is the one thing I can always count on with Caleb, his kindness and selflessness. I think he gets it from mom, she's the most selfless woman I know._

" _Thank you," I say smiling at him._

" _You know you're my best friend Bea, right?"_

" _Your mine too. Even when you talk about science and math and boast about being moved up in math," I say playfully._

" _When do you think Dad's going to come home?"_

" _I don't know," I say with a shrug. I don't like it when he works on the weekends but he told me that he works for the government so he has to go._

" _Put a lid on that," Caleb says as I gently stir around the peas._

" _Why?"  
_ " _It traps the steam inside so it'll get hotter quicker,"_

" _Really?"_

' _Try it," he says. I put the lid on top and wait while Caleb watches the chicken in the oven. I hear the lock being turned and immediately smile._

" _Daddy's home!" I exclaim, running to the door._

 _~BEATRICE~ AGE EIGHT:_

 _I swallow nervously as they pass out the report cards in neat envelopes. I won't be able to do nearly as well as Caleb has done. I find myself sweating profusely as I get handed mine. I grab my backpack and water bottle and make my way out of the school. It's busier than usual because it's Friday and everyone just wants to get out._

" _Tris!" I hear someone squeal behind me. I smile as I see Christina_

" _Hi Christina," I say with a smile._

" _I completely failed math! Well, not completely but I got a C! I completely suck at math! You're so lucky to have a brother who knows what he's doing," she says holding up her report card in front of me._

" _Yeah. But I did decent," I say. I'm probably only doing decent because Caleb explains everything._

" _Awesome! You work so hard, I wouldn't ever want to do as much work as you!" she says happily._

" _I see Caleb, I need to go. Bye Christina!" I say, walking to Caleb who is standing next to the doors._

" _Bye, Tris!" I walk up to Caleb with a smile. Caleb is gleaming with an almost cocky smile. He knows he did well this year, very well._

" _Hello, Bea," he says._

" _Get your report card?" I ask. He holds up the envelope._

" _Yup," We don't live very far from school, so we walk home every day. Caleb and I walk in a comfortable silence. He nudges me as gives me a direct look._

" _Don't look now, but I think that the creepy kid is following us," he mutters. I don't listen to him and look behind us. He's right. The creepy kid who always sits alone is walking right behind us._

" _I told you not to look!" He whisper-yells._

" _Sorry," I reply not-very-sincerely. I know the creepy kid is ten and always sits alone. I don't see why people call him creepy though. He's just really tall and maybe needs to cut his hair a little. We make an unspoken agreement to walk faster than usual. When we finally reach home, I let out a sigh that I didn't know I was holding._

" _Caleb, Beatrice! You're home early," she says with a smile. I notice her eyes flit towards the envelope in Caleb's hand._

" _Hi, mom," we say in unison._

" _Did you get your grade reports today?" asks a voice from behind us. Dad._

" _Dad! You're home early!" I say cheerfully, giving him a small hug._

" _Yeah, I've been really busy since my partner left and opened a hospital. I thought I should really take some time off,"_

" _Can we open up our reports?" asks Caleb excitedly._

" _Sure. Just put your backpack in the proper place and wash your hands," my mother orders. We obey quickly and then grab our envelopes before sitting down at the table._

" _We can open mine first," Caleb declares. Now my grades are going to seem terrible in comparison to his. Mom and Dad take his envelope and opens it up, hiding it from both of us._

" _Hmm. English, A+. Math, A+. Science, A+. Arts, A-, History, A+. Spanish, A. Physical Education, B-?" Says my dad suspiciously. Caleb's ears turn red and he looks funny. I beat him at something!_

" _Caleb excels in many subjects but he needs to work more on being more cooperative when he is playing sports. He claims that they are completely useless to his education. Caleb is good about explaining things and is very organized. His thought process is above most students at his age," My mom reads the note aloud._

" _Sports are useless" he mutters, his face turning redder._

" _Caleb, that's not a way to think," says my mother, a little cross._

" _Can we open mine?" I ask, with a new feeling of happiness._

" _Sure, honey," my mother says with a smile. They open up the envelope and the pressure is straining down on me._

" _English, A+. Math, B+. Science, A-. Arts, A+. History, A. Spanish, A-. Physical Education, A" my dad reads. I can see Caleb glaring at me and I can't tell if it's playful or not._

" _Beatrice tends to be a very well-rounded student. She often helps students with work and tends to be very generous. But, her stubbornness sometimes gets in the way of class.," my mother reads. I smile brightly but from the corner of my eye, I can see Caleb glaring at me._

" _Congrats, Bea," he says, but his words are empty. My mother hugs me tightly and I fall into her warm embrace, ignoring Caleb._

 _~BEATRICE~ AGE TEN:_

 _I smile at my book and sigh. I like school but Saturdays are the best. Saturday there is no volunteering, no extra things, and all my homework is finished. I'm about to dive back into my book when I hear the doorbell ring. I book my book on my bed and walk down the stairs quietly, Caleb behind me. A woman with short, neat hair is talking with my mother._

" _Beatrice has been demonstrating different attitude in school. We need to perform a classified test in order to try out our theory," she says._

" _What kind of test?" my mother asks politely._

" _A simulation," she says, holding up a mysterious liquid. My mother's eyes flit to mine._

" _Beatrice, Caleb, why don't you introduce yourselves?" my mother says._

" _Hello," I mutter, standing next to my mother. Caleb rushes down to shake her hand and introduce himself. My father comes and looks at the woman._

" _Hello, Jeanine," he says formally._

" _Good afternoon, do you think I could put your daughter through the simulation,"_

" _Of cour-" he begins, but my mother cuts him off._

" _I don't believe that it is necessary," my mother states firmly._

" _Natalie, this is something that will be done," my father says in a no-nonsense voice._

" _She's my child too,"_

" _Beatrice has shown signs of, divergence," the woman says, whispering the last word._

" _Beatrice, Caleb, go to your rooms," my father instructs. I wait in my room for at least twenty minutes. I'm too nervous about the whole situation to bother looking at my book. Divergence is dangerous. My door flies open and the lady holds a syringe._

" _This bed will be a fine substitute. Lie down and tilt your head, Beatrice," I slowly lay down and tilt my head._

" _You can't do this, Andrew!" I can hear my mother yell. I can't make out my father's reply. I see the lady push my hair to the side and inject me with something._

" _What are you doing?" I ask, but my head starts to feel a little heavy._

 _I wake up in a glass box. Caleb, Susan, Robert, and my parents all stand around the tank. Caleb smiles and points down to my feet. What's going on? I look down and cold water starts to rush out of a pipe. I hit the glass, panicking, and doing everything I can in attempt to break it. The water is up to my knees and it seems to be getting colder. I take off my cardigan and do everything I can to try to at least impede the flow of water. I bang on the glass before taking a deep breath. I can break the glass. It's only glass. I take a deep breath and punch the glass, picturing it as Molly's face. I remember punching her once, it was worth it. The glass cracks slightly and I smile. It's only glass, I can do this. I can feel the water climbing up my torso which causing me to punch again in the same spot. The glass shatters and my eyes fly open. I'm on the bed again with Jeanine, viciously taking notes. What just happened?_

" _So quick. Divergent," I can hear Jeanine mutter. The cold water felt so real even though it wasn't. I get off the bed and want to leave my room. What did she inject me with?_

" _You are staying right here, Beatrice," she says as I'm about to open the door._

" _Why?" I ask, confused. She was done with whatever she needed._

" _You need to be taken to a hospital. Stay here," she says. I obey and sit on the bed, slightly worried. Why did I need to go to a hospital? I could hear yelling from my mother and father and then I heard people thundering up the stairs. My door flew open and two people grab my arms._

" _This is for her own good, Natalie," I see Jeanine say._

" _No, no, no! You will not take her," my mother says stepping forward and grabbing my hands._

" _She'll be in the hospital made by Marcus. He's the one who requested this search. She'll be fine," Jeanine says, trying to calm my mother._

" _Natalie, she's going to be fine," I can hear my father say. The people who were holding my arms let go of them. My mother still grasps my hands tightly._

" _She will not go to a hospital. Nothing is wrong with her! Not with Marcus! Those reports were true," my mom yells at my dad. I've never heard her raise her voice this much._

" _Natalie, this behavior is inappropriate," my father replies._

" _Inappropriate? This is my daughter! Strangers just barged into my house and are trying to take away my daughter," she cries. She pulls me closer to her._

" _Andrew, you know what's good for your child," Jeanine says smiling, holding out a paper and a pen. My father briefly reads over it and nods._

" _You have my consent to treat her," he says. Suddenly, the rough arms pull me away._

" _You don't have my consent!" my mother screeches, trying to pull me back._

" _What's happening?" I cry, confused and scared._

" _Don't worry, Beatrice," says Jeanine. I try to kick the men pulling me back, but I'm not strong enough. Soon, I'm being pulled out the door, my mother still trying to grab me. I see one of the men release his grip on me and try to pull my mother. She holds on so tightly that her hands turn white. I see the man lose his patience and roughly push her back, causing her to let go and stumble to the ground._

" _What's happening?" I say, crying._

" _Everything's going to be fine," Jeanine says with a smile, shutting the car door. My mother gets back up and starts to run towards the car._

" _Be brave, Beatrice! Be brave!" she yells, tears running down her face._

 **A/N: Thanks for all of the support on the last chapter :) Shout out to** **athleticbooknerd and I read the Shatter Me series a while ago but this story is different. I did the backstory if this is what you meant. Hopefully, you enjoyed this chapter.**


	3. Chapter 3

I had another dream last night. I was a bird, trapped in a metal cage. A faceless man opened the cage and I just started flying. It was mid-summer and warm and nothing seemed to matter more. Suddenly, I was a human and in the sun on the warm grass. I wasn't crazy or locked up. My blond hair wasn't messy, it was brushed and soft. It felt like _flying._ Perhaps that's why people stood up for their freedom when it was taken away.

I change into a hospital gown and wait, sitting on the bed. I press the button, signifying that I need to use the restroom and wait for the woman to retrieve me. I look at myself in the mirror and notice how unruly my hair is. I walk out of the bathroom and look at the woman who's escorted me here.

"Ready to go?" she asks. I shake my head no.

"Can I have a brush?" I ask, expecting a sudden no.

"I need to check with someone before I can give you that. For now, I'll take you to your room," she said. I follow her back and wait. In the meanwhile, I press a button for food. About ten minutes later, I'm greeted with a click of a lock and a tray. _I need to eat normally._ I make sure to finish everything on my plate and eat as my mother had taught me. After the tray is taken away, I busy myself with the small collection of books I have. I study every page, noticing every detail. I hear a knock on the door and a click so I put them away.

"Beatrice, good morning," he said calmly, his suit is professional and creaseless. _That's how you have to look if you own the place._

"Good morning," I say cheerfully. I guess Dr. Eaton is surprised with my sudden change of behavior but if I am going to be let out, I need to act as normal as possible.

"Are you ready for the testing," I stop myself from nodding my head and instead say,

"Yes,"

"Follow me and a nurse will assist you. Also, you wanted a brush? I'd be happy to give you a small one," I smile and follow through.

"Thank you," I say as we are walking. I think I like him better than Ms. Matthews.

First, my eyes are checked, then my hearing, then they put me in an x-ray machine, and my weight and height are checked. Then, they do something new.

"Calm down, we are just going to do some simple checking," said the nurse. And suddenly, I'm asleep.

 _~D~R~E~A~M~_

I'm in the ward, walking with in front of me.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"Congratulations, Beatrice. You will be shortly leaving the ward. You've been so _cooperative_ and _easy to work with._ All we needed was Dr. Eaton's final test and you were out," She says, flashing her perfect porcelain teeth. I hug tightly and find myself crying.

"Thank you," I say. _I'm finally going home._

"But," I hold my breath, "you have to do something easy just to pass out. A final test," she says.

"W-what is it?" I ask stammering. She places a gun in my hand.

"Your final test," she begins, leading me behind a wall, "is to _get rid_ of these people," My face changes to horror when I see my mother, father, and brother, Caleb, all standing.

"I can't," I say to .

"Beatrice, don't make me change my mind. You have ten seconds,"

"Ten,"

"It's ok, Beatrice. We've had our chance to live our lives. Now have yours," my mother says. _Always too selfless._

"Nine,"

"We love you," says my father.

"Eight,"

"No, no, no," I mutter.

"Seven,"

"Go ahead Bea, I'll understand," says Caleb.

"Six,"

"I-"

"Five,"

"Why isn't she passing," says Dr. Eaton.

"Four,"

"I can't!" I say desperately.

"Three,"

"No!" I scream at her.

"Two," Miss. Matthews says warningly.

"One," she says. I place the cold metal against my head and manage to find the trigger. I place the smallest amount of pressure on it, and it shoots. _You can't have me or them._

 _~D~R~E~A~M~ ~E~N~D~_

I shoot up on the bed they put me in.

"3 minutes, five seconds," the nurse murmurs. I curl my self into a ball and begin to cry. _That was the most realistic nightmare I've ever had._ Dr. Eaton stands in front of me.

"Dr. Eaton, her results-" the nurse begins.

"Delete them. If they aren't deleted or completely gotten rid of, I will make sure you never get a job again. Don't you dare tell anyone the results," he mutters quietly. The nurse's eyes seem to widen as she quickly types something and sighs.

"It's gone for good. I swear, it never even happened!" she says a little too quickly.

"Good, you can go and help Eric," he orders.

"Yes, Doctor," she says and exits.

"What's wrong?" I ask, slightly panicking. _What did they not want anyone to know?_

"Nothing," Dr. Eaton replies a little too quickly.

"What did I do? What needs to be deleted?"

"It was just a simple error in the system," he replies smoothly.

"You're lying," I say. _Now I'll never get out. What did I do? What happened?_

"Does it matter?" he asks, annoyed.

"It's my result. _I_ did something. You have to tell me," I say stubbornly.

"I think I should take you to your room,"

"If you do then I'll tell everyone that there was a complication and I did something in three minutes and five seconds," I challenge.

"Nobody would believe you,"

"That nurse would. One voice rises many," I say.

"Why are you so smart," he mutters.

"Excuse me?"

"Just saying, you weren't talkative until now. Until you wanted to blackmail me?"

"I'm not blackmailing you! I just wanna know,"

"You wouldn't want to know. It's like getting told you have the incurable plague," _I heard that analogy before. When my brother was talking about 'divergents'. My father told him to not even mention the name divergent and sent him up to his room. It was because children, adults, and teenagers were taken away if it was found out. They said it was dangerous. Am I divergent?_

"Am I divergent?" I ask quietly. _Please say no. Please say no. Please say no._ He just nods.

"Is that what that dream was?"

"Simulation," he responds quietly.

"Does this mean that I'm never getting out?" I whisper.

"If you tell everyone, it's a definite no,"

"But you're the owner of this whole thing! You could let people out!" I say, quickly. His face changes to confusion and I immediately regret letting him know that I know that information.

"No, I'm not,"

"But the logo says _Eaton's Hospital for the Sick_!"

"No, I'm the son of the owner. Wait, what logo?"

"Oh," I say quietly, ignoring the question. _This means he wasn't here to let me out and do final testing. This means I'm not getting out. This is it._ I walk with Dr. Eaton to my room in silence. Silent tears start dripping down my face that I don't bother wiping away. A nurse meets us as I'm about to go into the room.

"Beatrice requested a brush. Would allowing her to use this be ok?" asked a nurse.

"Of course," he said quietly. I'm handed the brush and locked into my room. I cry as I brush my hair on my bed. I remember when I was younger I trapped a butterfly in a jar. It lasted for a little and died in there. Is this what it felt like? Trapped? Did it have hope that is was going to get out? Maybe. I run my hands through my hair. It feels softer and less tangly as I brush it out. Once I'm satisfied, I place the brush on the desk. I change into a nightgown, despite it being almost lunch time. I'm not hungry though. I think about ways I can escape.

I've been pacing around in this fucking nightgown for three hours now, just thinking of ways to escape. Suddenly, the door flies open, without a knock, causing me to stop in my tracks. _._

" ," I stutter, making my way to the bed. Two men were behind her, locking the door.

" _Dr. Matthews,"_ She corrects and then says, "Beatrice, I'm so happy to see you again," she says, her words were laced sweetly, but with a soft bitterness. Like burnt caramel.

"You just saw me a day or two ago," I say nervously, looking from her to the men, and then back to her. Jeanine pulls out a small syringe from her pocket with a mysterious liquid.

"Now Beatrice, I'm going to give you an injection. Hold still," she says, pulling out gloves and taking out what smelled like an alcohol wipe.

"What about Dr. Scott? Doesn't she usually give me shots?" I say quickly.

"Yes, but let's keep this one between us,"

"No!" I say without thinking.

"No? Ok, well there is _more_ that one way to do this" she says with a smile.

"W-what?"

"Peter! Drew! Get the door," she says and they lean against the door instantly, blocking it with themselves. She grabs my arm and I pull it back.

"No!" I say, scooting back quickly, trying to protect myself. I lift the small case protecting the emergency button but I'm too slow and I feel rough hands pulling me back.

"No! No! No!" I screech.

"Hold still darling," Jeanine says, holding my arm still, before injecting me. My head starts to feel heavy and I can't move. _Were they putting me to sleep? No, no, no, no._

 **A/N: That's all for now. Please review your thoughts. Thanks for all the support on the last chapter :) Happy belated Valentine's Day.**


	4. Chapter 4

I wake up with a headache and everything feels heavy. _Is this what it's like to be dead?_

"Is she awake?" I hear a male voice say.

"I think she's regaining consciousness," I hear a familiar voice say. _Dr. Eaton?_

"What the hell did she inject into her?"

"An altered version of the simulation,"

"Why? Is she…?" I hear the voice trail off. _I thought Dr. Eaton told me to tell no one if I ever wanted to get out._ I don't hear a reply though.

"They took him away," I hear the same voice whisper.

"Uriah?" Dr. Eaton asks.

"Yeah. I-I don't know how I'm going to get him out,"

"I'll see what I can do Zeke, it's never easy to get them out,"

"I know," I want to force my eyes open, I want to see what's going on. My eyes flutter open after a while of trying. I find both men have their eyes on me.

"Do you need help up?" asks Dr. Eaton. I nod my head gently. _Why does everything hurt?_ I sit up on the bed, feeling worse than before. My eyes burn. My head hurts. I can barely move any part of me. Slowly, everything starts to come back to me. Jeanine trying to inject me with something and succeeding, me screaming, and everything else is a blur.

"Wow, she looks worse than I thought," says the g- _Zeke_. I study him with his dark brown skin and dark eyes.

"Do you have a brother?" I ask, he reminded me of a taller version of a boy I've seen. Perhaps it was his brother.

"How did you know?" he says, looking at Dr. Eaton.

"I didn't tell her. She could probably hear us talking while she was unconscious," Dr. Eaton replies.

"No, I saw someone. He looked just like you," I confess. Dr. Eaton nods and beckons Zeke to come out of the room with him.

"Excuse us," he says to me. Part of me wants to listen at the door, but I can't move. As the door shuts, I try to crane my neck to listen. I hear voices and try to focus in on them.

"She will do very well," I can hear Dr. Eaton say softly.

"But we don-" Zeke begins, a little louder.

"I can tell," Dr. Eaton says cutting him off. _What were they talking about?_ They talk a little more, but too quietly for me to hear. As they walk closer to the door, I return to my position and look as normal as possible.

"What happened to me?" I say, not realizing how weak my voice became.

"Jeanine Matthews tried to put you to sleep along with two others. Peter Hayes and someone by the first name of Drew. We're still trying to track him down,"

"Why?" I ask.

"I don't know. But, she gave you a very small dose of poison in a simulation. I don't understand why she would want to kill you slowly. We need you to think Beatrice shortly Beatrice. We're going to be giving you three people. One of these people had to have supplied Jeanine with poison. They all work in the science department. Tell me if you've heard Jeanine talk about them or if you've seen them with Jeanine at all. He brings the first one in. He's scary looking with piercings all over his face. Part of his hair is shaved and he has tattoos running up along his arms.

"This is Eric. Have you seen him before?" I study his face. I've seen him before, not talking to Jeanine.

"I've seen him. Not with Jeanine, though" I say. He's pushed to one side. The next one brought in looks oddly familiar with his brown hair and green eyes.

"This is Caleb. Have you seen him before?" _Caleb?_ I check his eyes and hair one more time. His eyes are the same, but just more tired. _He works here? Why didn't he visit me! Was I deemed unstable?_

"Caleb?" I whisper. This is an actual dream. _Maybe I did die and go to heaven. But heaven isn't in a hospital, is it?_

"I think she's on to something. Did he give her the poison?" asks Dr. Eaton

"No!" I say quickly.

"Take him out. Sorry for the inconvenience Dr. Wright," says Dr. Eaton. _Wright? That's my mother's surname. Maybe he's adopted it?_

"Wait!" I say and they lead him out. I want to get up but I can't move without hurting.

"We don't have all day," I hear Zeke murmur.

"Caleb it's me!" I say, but he shows no recognition, "Beatrice! Your sister"

"I'm sorry but I believe you have the wrong person. My sister Beatrice many died years ago,"

"No, she didn't! I'm Beatrice!" I yell frantically. Dr. Eaton walks by my side and tries to calm me. Caleb looks at Dr. Eaton in the eye, his face stoic.

"I did it," He admits without shame.

"What?" Asks Dr. Eaton, his head snapping up.

"I gave Jeanine the poison. I knew what she was going to do with it,"

"Why?" I ask looking at him.

"Some people just deserve to disappear," he says, facelessly.

"He's lying!" I cry.

"No. Check footage at exactly 4:07 a.m. on Wednesday. Check the deleted files in folder #4567. The password is 6xt24d9jgdc0" he says looking at Dr. Eaton. I'm slightly impressed with his memory. Then again, he's always been good with stuff like that.

"Hold him until we check. Turn him over to the main security for now with Jeanine Matthews and Peter Hayes," Dr. Eaton directs.

"Why did you do that? Bring him back! Bring him back!" I scream.

"I'm sorry but we can't let you see him right now," Dr. Eaton says.

"Why?!" I say like a child. This is going to get me nowhere.

"I have something to ask you, Beatrice," says looking at me.

"What?" I ask.

"I was wondering if you could go through the simulation every other day. I want to monitor your progress," he says, "please," he adds.

"Will I get to see Caleb again?" I ask.

"I will give you five minutes to talk to him," he says.

"I want half an hour or no deal," I demand.

"Twenty minutes, no more. Or you won't get to see him," he says. I think about for a while, biting my lip gently.

"Ok," I agree. My head starts to feel less heavy and I'm feeling better.

"Really? Ok! Zeke, have Caleb put in a separate room and we can let her talk to him," Dr. Eaton demands.

"But we aren't supposed to allow any visitors or-" Dr. Eaton cuts him off.

"We also aren't supposed to allow in-office relationships," he says staring at Zeke whose face turns red.

"Fine," he mumbles. I'm taken to a room.

"Wait here. If anything happens that you don't like, scream," he says. _Does he not believe that Caleb's my brother? Well, I am in a ward. Maybe he does believe I'm crazy._ I see Caleb enter with Zeke behind him. His handcuffs hold his hands behind his back and he looks almost evil.

"Caleb?" I say barely above a whisper as Zeke helps him sit down.

"What the hell do you want now, Beatrice?" he asks, annoyed.

"Caleb, do you remember me?" I whisper, scared of his answer.

"Of course I remember you! All I've heard these past years are Beatrice, Beatrice, Beatrice! You split our family apart! What do you think happened when mom saw them take you away because of dad? They broke apart! If you had never been born then my life would have been perfect! I always got the best grades and I was valedictorian. Mom and dad were just too busy! Dad has just...changed and mom is still selfless but it was like my life was torn apart! You were just sitting in this, this, daycare for adults!" he spits out. I laugh humorlessly. He's still the same Caleb.

"It's been fourteen years Caleb and all you want to talk about is how you've been neglected? You have _friends._ You get to see mom and dad. You can go outside. You don't get experimented on! Did you think killing me would've made you feel better about your situation?" I hold back any tears I want to let out. Caleb stays silent, ashamed maybe?

"Actually, I think if you killed me I would've been free and happy," I say with a bittersweetness. If death meant freedom, then I might just accept it.

"I don't want you to die, Caleb," I say. My eyes flit to Zeke who was conveniently in the corner of the room.

"Zeke, if I lift the charges on Jeanine, will Caleb live?" I ask. His jumps out of his daydream, surprised at being acknowledged. He thinks over it for a while.

"Yeah, I guess. Yup, that would work. But they'll get something for trespassing. The hospital may be able to override your decision if they think you're mentally unable to make the decision by yourself. Not recommended though since she _did_ try to kill you," he says.

"I'm lifting the charges," I say. Caleb looks at me with slight surprise but he masks it with a stoic face.

"Are you sure?" asks Zeke.

"Yes," I say. He pulls out a walkie-talkie and speaks into it.

"Four, she's _lifting_ the charges," he says, shock evident in his voice. Dr. Eaton walks into the room, looking at me.

"Are you lifting the charges," he asks. I nod.

"Why do you have to be so damn selfless," I can hear Dr. Eaton mutter under his breath. I see Caleb smirk at Zeke as his handcuffs are taken off.

"I'll just get back to my job here," Caleb announces.

"No you're not," Dr. Eaton deadpans.

"You are not the boss of my section," Caleb sasses back.

"Perhaps you've forgotten that my father owns the hospital and I have power over many sections, yours being one of them. I'm above your boss so, you are fired," he explains as Caleb stands there, shocked.

"You're lucky your sister is so fond of you. I wouldn't have let you get away," I can hear Zeke mutter loudly. Dr. Eaton paces around, his face looks shocked and almost annoyed. Definitely angry.

"Why?" he suddenly asks, directly looking at me.

"Why what?" I ask.

"Why would you do that? Do you know that Jeanine will continue working here? I don't have the power to fire her,"

"You father will fire her. I'm pretty sure he has enough morals to do that," he lets out a dry, humorless chuckle.

"Yeah, sure," he says sarcastically.

"But-"

"Let's just get you onto the simulator. Remember the deal?" he says, cutting me off. I nod and I get up. I should've realized that my legs were asleep so instead of moving forward, I just wobble and cling to the wheelchair to stay balanced. I probably looked like a complete idiot but I decline the help Zeke and Dr. Eaton try to give me and wait until my legs feel normal again for a second before taking the first step forward. Nothing happens so I continue walking. We walk down a different hallway, it looks more unused and weird. Zeke follows behind us carefully, almost as if he expects someone to catch us.

"Four, are we allowed to be here?" Zeke asks.

"No, but we won't get caught," he says. _Where are we going?_

After a lot of walking, we finally reach a door. Dr. Eaton shuffles through his key before pulling out one that looked pretty worn out. He pushed it into the door and turned. It clicked much like my door and swung open. He ushered us in and closed the door, locking it behind him. The room looks mostly unused but cleaner than I expected it to be. The walls are painted are white and on one side of the room, there is a computer with many wires plugged in and wires sticking out. Right in the middle, there's a hospital recliner. I see Dr. Eaton open a box and take out a syringe. He adjusts the recliner so that it slightly reclines.

"Lay down," he says. I comply while studying the syringe.

"What's in the syringe?" I ask.

"It's made of a chemical that does something to your brain to adjust your dreams to your fears. We have developed technology to see the person in action inside the simulation. It will make you feel very drowsy and at approximately 60 seconds, put you to sleep," he explains.

"Oh," I say.

"But I have programmed this with someone else's fears to see how you react," he says. He pushes my hair back and inserts the needle into my neck. He was right about the slight drowsiness. I find myself blinking more to attempt to stay awake but I eventually feel myself fall into sleep.

 _~SIMULATION~_

I find myself inside a room with small slits in the wall there is a door. I try the door, but it's locked. The openings bring in light but the room looks extremely unorthodox and then I see it. A few small spiders crawl through the opening. I'm not afraid of spiders but I used to be afraid of them when I was smaller. The amount of spiders in the room seems to triple. I feel something crawling up my leg so I swat it off and stomp my feet, killing multiple spiders. _There has to be a way out, this isn't real._ Stomping my feet as a walk, I try to pull and shove the door all I can. Spiders crawl on my arms and up my legs. _This still isn't real._ An idea pops into my mind and I try sliding the door, I let out a small sigh of relief as run out the door and into the sunlight.

 _~END SIMULATION~_

I gasp, sitting up, waking up from the _simulation_.

"Woah," Zeke mutters, "that was quick," Dr. Eaton was staring at the screen as if trying to figure it out. I find myself still slightly shaking and it's almost as if the spiders are still crawling on me. _Why does he even want to make me participate in these simulations?_

"Why?" I ask.

"What?" asks Dr. Eaton looking at me.

"Why do you want to conduct all these tests?" I ask. _Maybe he's a crazy scientist?_

"It's just important," he says after a while.

"Do you think I'm just to dumb to understand?" I challenge.

"No,"

"Then why?"

"I thought I wouldn't a have a problem with you asking so many questions,"

"It must be because you're so approachable," I say flatly, "you know. Like a bed of nails." He stares at me, and I don't look away. He isn't a dog but the same rules apply. Looking away is submissive. Looking him in the eye is a challenge. It's my choice.

"Careful, Beatrice," he says. I'm not sure if it's meant to be taken as condescending, but it feels like it. I bite back my response. Letting him glare before looking back at the computer.

 **A/N: Probably a good stopping point, right? How does everyone like the story so far? Also, has anyone checked out Webtoon? Any recommendations for stuff to read on their? Small announcement, my old shared account will not be active anymore. Anyways, have a nice day! I hope to update soon-ish. I promise that all story updates from now on will be 1000+ words.**

 **-L**


	5. Chapter 5

I lay down, going over today's events. I saw Caleb! Part of that thought makes me giddy and the other part makes me sad. Something makes me realize that my bittersweet reunion with him was going to be the only time I'm ever going to see any of my family again. One part of me can't stop thinking about how dark and blue Dr. Eaton's eyes were. They were like this ocean of darkness with a tint of light. A knock on the door startles my thinking. _Oh, our night meeting._ A familiar click fills the air and the door opens up. I stay in bed but sit up.

"Good evening, Beatrice," he says somewhat cooly. I feel slightly awkward considering I basically challenged his authority earlier.

"Hi," I say quietly.

"How are you?"

"I'm ok. How are you?"

"I'm well. Are you ok with going through the simulations daily?"

"Yes," I say. Today's simulation wasn't too hard.

"Just be aware that next time they will be your fears," he says.

"Ok," I say, a breathily. His eyes on me are somewhat nerve-wracking. I wish he didn't look so serious.

"Do you have any questions?" he asks. _How old are you?_ He can't be more than 28. I swallow back that question, deciding it's rude. I turn to face him completely, letting my legs hand over the bed

"When do you think I would be able to leave?" I ask, blatantly, not looking at him.

"I'm honestly not sure," he says, running his hands through his hair.

"Do you think I'll be able to go outside, not as a discharged patient? But accompanied?"

"I would be able to do that," he says after some thought. A smile creeps at the end of his lips. My eyes widen and I can feel tears creeping up. _For 14 years I've been trapped indoors, finally._ I look at my very pale hand and pinch it. It hurts, I'm not dreaming. For a second, I want to hug him but that would be slightly inappropriate. His eyes burn into to mine for a few seconds before he awkwardly clears his throat, looking away.

"I'll tell you as soon as I'm able to get permission to let you go outside accompanied by a doctor," Suddenly he grabs my hand softly which had been resting on my lap and squeezes softly. He awkwardly stands up and straightens his still impeccable shirt.

"Good night," he says.

"Bye," I reply, still a little stunned by the touch. His hands were warmer than I expected. His knuckles were rough but in a way that gives them uniqueness. The lingering warmness faded as I pulled up my sheets and took a deep breath, allowing myself to fall into what I knew would be a deep sleep.

~ 6 MONTHS LATER ~

I sit up, gasping and crying. This was it, this couldn't go on. It was too real, too much, too heart-wrenching. I hate seeing my family in these simulations, especially when it's used against me. It hurts more that it's the only time I'm able to see them other than in dreams. The simulations had gotten worse and worse and I couldn't deal with them. There was not outside and I still trapped. Dr. Eaton hadn't made good on his promise to take me outside.

"What the hell was that, Tris?" Dr. Eaton says, pulling my arm up, forcing me slightly forward. _What's happening? I scan the room and see a man I don't recognize. Why is he here?_

"I…" My breath comes in a hiccup. "I didn't-"

"Get yourself together! This is pathetic." He yells. Something within me snaps. My tears stop. Heat races through my body, driving the weakness out of me, and I smack him so hard my knuckles burn with the impact. He stares at me, one side of his face bright with blush-blood, and I stare back. Shock seems to run through him as he processes what I did.

"Shut up," I say. I yank my arm from his grasp and wipe my tears from my face.

"Damn, Four. Didn't realize that you were that hard on your group. Is this a private class on how to face your fears?" says the man.

"Eric, what I do with my students may be different from your method but you have no reason to intrude," Dr. Eaton says oddly calm.

"I can see why you'd have to be rough with such a… firecracker," he says with a laugh.

"Get out," Dr. Eaton says.

"Fine, call me if you need any help with her," Eric says with a smirk. I don't like the way he stared at me.

"Are you ok?" Dr. Eaton asks. I'm too angry and confused to want to respond with kindness

"What the hell do you mean why 'are you ok?'? You just yelled at me for something that you wanted to do! You didn't tell me the simulations would get worse like this! They're becoming more and more realistic and it just hurts more! Remember a few months ago when you promised you would find a way to take me outside? Well, I'm _still_ waiting. You're just trying to tamper with my feelings and give me a little of what I want so you can just take what you want. You are cruel!" I yell, letting out some of my frustrations over the past few months.

"'I am not cruel." He scowls at me.

"Really? Then what are you?"

"If I hadn't acted you would've been caught and then you'd never have gotten out!" I chew my lip and my cheeks flush a slight shade of red.

"Is that really how you wanted to do it? What about going outside?"

"Ok, maybe my method wasn't the be-"

"Shut up!" I scream at him, letting all the rage I've been wanting to let out for years. Dr. Eaton takes a big breath.

"Zeke, take her to her room," he commands. Zeke nods and looks at me.

"Follow me, Beatrice," Zeke says. I angrily walk with Zeke. When we get to my room, he unlocks the door. I walk in and he walks in. I stare at him, confused. _He should be outside locking the door._ Instead, he closes the door and bursts out laughing.

"What?" I ask, confused.

"Did you see Four's face! He looked pissed! You hit him!" he says between laughs.

"Is that good?"

"Yes and no. I think he needed to be slapped. He was being an ass. Then again, he is your doctor and I probably shouldn't be laughing," he says and stops laughing.

"Oh," I reply

"I never said thank you," he says after a few seconds of silence.

"For what?"

"Informing me about my brother. We were able to track him and get him out,"

"Why wouldn't I inform you?"

"Why would you?" He asks skeptically.

"Do you think I wish for another person to be trapped like me?"

"You don't seem like a Beatrice," he says.

"What?" _That was random._

"Beatrice sounds too elderly and shy," he explains.

"Then who am I?" He thinks for a little while before smiling.

"You are a Tris,"

"How did you come with up with that?" I ask, amused with the nickname.

"Bea sounds too little sister like. Beat Rice is just dumb. But Tris sounds cool,"

"You actually came up with the idea of Beat Rice?" I ask, emitting a small laugh.

"Yeah, but as I said, it was dumb. Can I call you Tris?"

"Sure," I reply. The door flies open and Zeke jumps, surprised.

"What are you doing here?" asks Dr. Eaton.

"I was just helping her calm down. You know, it's not good to leave an angry patient alone. But I think I'll just leave now since you're here. Bye!," he says quickly leaving. Dr. Eaton shakes his head and sighs.

"I'll leave you alone," he says, looking at me. I just nod, not looking at him in the eye. The door shuts and the door locks. I was in someone's else's fear this time but it was still horrific. I'd been given a clock so I knew it was 5:03 pm. It wasn't too early to go to sleep. I get into my nightgown. What was the point of staying awake?

 _~ABOUT 4 HOURS LATER~_

A piercing scream forcing me out of my slumber and the fire alarm goes off. I can just barely hear the lock on my door click. I groggily force my eyes to open and get up. I put my hand on the door handle and open the door. My eyes start to adjust to the light in the hallway. _What's going on?_ Other patients and nurses are running around like crazy.

"Was that a false alarm?" I can hear someone yell. Some patients are hyperventilating and I can see an elderly woman trying to push her wheelchair with her small frail arms. I can hear crying and screaming and then I can feel my hands being grabbed and forced behind me.

"Get her!" I can hear someone hiss. A bag is put over my head, distorting me. I'm dragged away from the chaos and less light is shining through the back. I pull on my hand as hard as I can, getting from whoever was grabbing it. One hand pops from their grip. I immediately try to rip the bag off of my head. I scream loudly, causing someone to put their hand over my mouth, muffling the sound. I bite down on the hand, drawing blood.

"Bitch!" The man screams, pulling his hand away. I scream, hoping that someone can hear me. I kick and scream as much as I can. Suddenly, I feel cool, sharp metal touch my arm and I freeze. I cry out in pain as the knife digs into my arm. Finally, one of them steps in front of me. I recognize his brown hair and sadistic smile. He was working for Dr. Matthews. He punches me in the head, knocking me out. _Am I going to die?_

 **A/N: Thanks for all the support :) I'll keep on trying to update every 10ish days. If you have any suggestions please feel free to tell me! Also, I don't think I mentioned that Tobias (no, not the one from Divergent), has a younger brother. He's basically this miniature copy of Tobias but with lighter hair and eyes. He's probably the cutest two-year-old ever. I don't know why I felt the need to share that…**

 **Anyways, have a great day (or night or afternoon)!**

 **-L**


	6. Chapter 6

It's fucking hot. Why is it so hot? It's winter! It's fucking February! Why does my head feel like it's burning? The sound of the fire alarm flashed back to me. Was the building on fire? Am I on fire? Why does everything hurt so much? I cough a little. I can't seem to move or open my eyes. Then I feel something extra hot on my hand. Fire. I scream out in pain and move my hand. The scream was pathetic and rather soft. I clear my throat and take a deep breath. I regret taking a breath in because all I got was smoke. I drag myself as far away as possible, on my hands and knees.

"Help!" I try to scream. The smoke from the fire makes my head feel heavy and my lungs burn. I force my eyes to open and look at the fire around me. It's amazing how fire can be something so dazzling and dizzying. I find myself lying down. The fire looks warm and beautiful while extremely dangerous. At some point, I think I let out a laugh. Perhaps it was the thought of dying that gave me a bittersweet sense of humor.

"I found her! Fire! Fire!" I can hear someone scream. No, please let me stay here.

~FLASH~

"Well, it's one for the money. Two for the show," _Huh, Elvis?_

~FLASH~

"Be brave, Beatrice," I can see a nurse with a mask on. She gently pulls her mask slightly down, letting me see her face and gives me a soft smile. Mom?

~FLASH~

I throw up, everywhere. I feel so sick. Why is it so dark?

~FLASH~

"Three to get ready. Now go, go, go! But don't you, step on my blue suede shoes. Well, you can do anything, but stay off of my blue suede shoes," I can feel my eyes open up. Where am I? Why does my throat feel so dry? Stuff is connected to my arms, my left hand is bandaged, and I feel a wave of nausea.

"Beatrice," I can hear a voice say, "it's ok. You're ok, just relax. Excuse me! She's awake! She woke up!" my eyes flit to the voice. Dr. Eaton. A nurse walks into the room.

"Hello," she says. I swear Elvis is playing.

"Is that Elvis?" I ask, still nauseous.

"Um, yes," she says, "How are you feeling,"

"Nauseous," I reply.

"You were inhaling the smoke from the fire for at least five minutes maybe more," she says. She holds a tray with a glass of water on it. She gently places it on my lap.

"Thank you, what happened to the other hospital," I ask.

"You're in the other hospital," replied Dr. Eaton.

"W-what do you mean?" I ask.

"The whole hospital wasn't on fire, only that room. Someone must've pulled an alarm or something,"

"Who's playing Elvis?" I ask, taking a sip of water.

"Is that the question you should be asking right now?"

"I wanna know,"

"Zeke," I'm surprised to see how much he can blend into the room. How did I not notice him here?

"I think I'm going to throw up," I say, feeling waves of nausea overcome me. A bag is handed to me by the nurse. I don't throw up, but I hold the bag with the nurse's help. I sigh as nausea slowly fades.

"I'm ok," I say.

"Do you want Zeke to turn off the music?" asks Dr. Eaton.

"No, it's fine," I reply.

"He's had like six songs on replay the whole time," Dr. Eaton says with a hint of annoyance.

"Well, it's good music," says Zeke.

"Would it be good music to you if Shauna didn't like it?"

"Shut up, yes it would be," Zeke says.

"Can you turn it up?" I say. Both their heads snap to me.

"Sure," says Zeke, smirking at Dr. Eaton.

"I never said Elvis was bad," says Dr. Eaton. It's quite entertaining watching them banter like this. I take another sip of water

"Elvis is king, don't you think Tris?" Zeke says.

"Hell yeah, that guy can sing," I reply, smiling. I remember my mother used to play Elvis in the house when my father wasn't home. It wasn't very loud, but it was fun just being selfish for a while and indulging in those things.

"Tris?" Dr. Eaton asks, looking at Zeke.

"Just a nickname I came up with," Zeke replies

"Why?"

"It's obvious that she'll be with us for a while so why not? Anyways, she's not like a Beatrice,"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, she did slap you," Zeke points out. _Oh god._ I'd forgotten about that.

"I'm sorry. That wasn't right of me to do. I was acting out on anger," I say. I'm stubborn, but I'm smart enough to know when to step down.

"I shouldn't have acted like that either," Dr. Eaton replies. Silence fills the room uncomfortably.

"You had a visitor earlier," says Zeke.

"Who?" I ask. _Who would visit me? It's not like I know anyone,_

"A journalist but I sent him off. Can I go, Four? I need to eat," I frown in disappointment but who was I expecting?

"Sure," replies Four.

"Will I have to do more simulation stuff?" I whisper. Dr. Eaton ponder for a few seconds

"No," he says, his face softening.

"Did I burn my hand?" I ask looking at my bandaged hand.

"Yes, and thankfully, that was the only thing that burned. Your arm has a deep cut made by a knife, most likely,"

"How long have I been here?"

"Probably just about 14 hours," he says.

"What time is it?"

"11:34 pm," says glancing down at his watch.

"Where did you get the nickname Four?"

"Why so many questions?"

"Why did you dodge that question?"

"Do you want to know more about the attack?"

"Yes," I reply. _Why does he keep dodging questions he doesn't want to answer._

"Well, there are three suspects. Molly Atwood, Peter Hayes, and Drew Smith. They might have all been involved and have been arrested. The police are looking at the camera footage and in one shot you can see Peter's face clearly but there are two other people with him. They were caught loitering close to the hospital directly after the fire. They were searched and multiple items were found on them Smith had a lighter in his pocket, Atwood had a knife, and Peter was found with a butter knife and had slight traces of drugs on him. We found you in a small storage room about 4 minutes after they lit the room on fire. They must have known that most of the stuff in the room was flammable It must have been planned. A nurse thought she caught sight of someone dragging you away. We were able to find you quick enough but you looked," he pauses for a second.

"Dead?" I ask.

"Smiling and coughing," he says.

"Oh,"

"It must have been because of the smoke inhalation,"

"How long will I have to stay here?"

"Depends. Could be released today or in a few days. They think you're good though,"

"Can anyone visit me here?"

"Maybe, I guess," Dr. Eaton says tilting his head.

"Well, would I be able to get a phone call?"

"I think so but-"

"I need a phone,"

"Who are you going to call? Anyways I don't-"  
"Marilyn Monroe," I say sarcastically.

"Tris, the hospital might not allow you to call anyone because you are a patient at a mental facility," he says. _Did he just address me by my nickname? Should I keep addressing him and Dr. Eaton? Four?_ I stay silent, thinking for a little bit.

"But you can call anyone you want, right?"

"Yes, but-"

"Let's just think for a second. _Hypothetically,_ do you think if I were to give you a number, would you call them?" I ask. A small smile creeps on his lips.

"Hypothetically that would be quite possible."

"Would it be possible for you to tell them about this hospital and about a certain patient? Hypothetically, of course,"

"That sounds quite possible,"

" **[Insert Random Phone Number (It will be used as Natalie Prior's Number)].** Would you call that number?" I ask. Dr. Eaton types something in on his phone.

"Quite possible," A nurse enters and Dr. Eaton jumps back. I hadn't realized how close we'd gotten when talking.

"Hi, Four," she says with a smile. She's really pretty and tall with dark brown hair and dark eyes. Something about her body makes me realize how childlike I am.

"Hello, Nita," he says, visibly tensing.

"Is this your patient? Is she the one that with the mental disease that makes it hard to understand what people are saying? Hi!" she says, leaning close to my face. I resist the urge to tell her to back off.

"Hi," I say.

"Anyways, Four, after you're done here, do you wanna hang out at my apartment. I just got some new coffee and I know how much you like it," she says, obviously flirting. _This can't be professional._ _Can you please not flirt with her boyfriend right in front of me. Or at least don't make what you want so obvious. I don't have a mental disease that prevents me from comprehending what you're saying._ I notice that both Nita and Dr. Eaton are looking at me. Nita looks near horrified and Dr. Eaton looks both surprised and… amused?

"What?" I ask, genuinely confused. But then it hits me. _Oh. The one time I think out loud. Fuck…_

 **A/N: That's this update. Wow, that every ten days update was thrown out the window immediately. My mom and I are moving to a smaller house because now there are only two people in my family. Things have been really rough for my mom and I don't really feel anything. I wasn't really, really close to my dad and he worked a lot of the time. He was a good dad though, dropping in and telling a few dad jokes but I can't cry. Maybe there's something wrong with me? Anyone wanna guess the Elvis song I have stuck in my head? Anyways, hope to update soon.**

 **-L**


	7. Chapter 7

"She's _not_ my girlfriend. Nita, I'm going to have to decline your request," I was kind of expecting to be scolded or something but I'm not going to complain about this response.

"Ok, Four. Tell me if you change your mind," she says making her way to the door.

"I'm sorry," I say quickly as soon as she leaves, "I didn't mean to say that out loud,"

"You're right though, it's not professional for her to do what she did. Especially with a patient in the room,"

"Do you think I'm crazy?" I ask. _He's not upset. Maybe he thinks I don't know any better._

"Yes," he says, "but in a good way," _A good way? What is that supposed to mean?_

"What do you mean?"

"Sometimes, you do things that don't make any sense but end up making sense later once I've thought about the situation,"

"Why did you make me go through the simulations? Why do you make them so hard? Why do you have me go through that so often? " I say, lowering my voice.

"My first instinct is to push you until you break, just to see how hard I have to press," he says looking down. He clenches his hands into a fist at the word"break." My body tenses at the edge in his voice. Why does he want to break me?

His dark eyes lifting to mine, he adds, "But I resist it."

"Why..." I swallow hard. "Why is that your first instinct?"

"Fear doesn't shut you down; it wakes you up. I've seen it. It's fascinating." He opens his hand and lets out a breath. "Sometimes I just...want to see it again. Want to see you awake."

"Oh," I say.

"I'm sorry, this must seem weird," For a second, I remember the simulations he's put me through. One I was drowning, this time in the middle of the ocean, the water raged around me. In another, I watched my family slowly bleed to death. And in the last, I was held at gunpoint and forced to shoot them. These were only a few but they seem just as terrifying every time.

"I guess something good has come out of it for me. I know what fear is now," I say, my eyes glancing everywhere but him.

"I should go," Dr. Eaton says, standing up. I don't say anything as he leaves. I almost wait for the lock to click, but it doesn't. I can hear crying from outside my room. This wasn't the petty cry a child had when they had to get a shot. It was the cry of being taken away. The crying doesn't last for too long, only a few minutes but that doesn't mean that it never happened. _What about the child? What their parents? What could have happened in the childhood that was stripped from them? What if they turn out like me? Why am I even wondering this today?_ I feel thoughts rush into my head. _You never had a childhood. Your friends have probably forgotten about you. Your parents were torn apart because of this mental disease you have. You never got to go to college. Never learned to drive. Never got to be a normal teenager. Never got to say goodbye. You go to a hospital where people fade away slowly. If you were to die tomorrow, nobody would care._

At some point, I must have fallen asleep because someone is gently shaking me awake. _Dr. Eaton._

"You can be discharged from the hospital. You're safe," he says.

"Is the ward close to here?" I ask.

"It's actually quite far away walking. So, you will be escorted by Zeke and me via private car to your section," he says.

"Oh," I can't bring myself to say much more. I just follow him until I realize that we have reached a door. It isn't any door, but a door to the outside. Dr. Eaton walks through it and realizes that I haven't followed him through the automatic door.

"Are you coming?" he asks expectantly.

"W-we're g-going o-outside?" I say, my voice stuttering. I suddenly can't stop myself from shaking. This is the first time in many years that I've been outside while sober.

"Just for a little while. If that's ok. We could've gone through the building," he says, I swear that he's smiling, even if it's just a little.

"You did this?" I ask, slightly stuttering and shaking.

"For the patient's benefit. We wouldn't want you having to walk that far, now would we?" I hold back my response about using a wheelchair and take a few steps forward. _Will the air feel the same? How cold will it be?_ Millions of questions flood my head. Dr. Eaton steps out and I quickly follow. The cold air hits me harder than expected but I can't find myself complaining. I let out a small, quiet sigh. I look up and I can see many clouds overhead, leaving a sliver of the moon. I don't realize how abnormally slow I'm walking until Dr. Eaton clears his throat.

"Sorry," I say sheepishly, slightly hurrying.

"Take your time. I'm not sure if I'll be able to do this again," he says. I sigh, wishing the sun was out. I miss its warmth. After what feels like five minutes, I walk into the car. Dr. Eaton is sitting in the front with Zeke driving. I look at the hospital with all its lights and in about two minutes the ride's over. I enjoy the outside one last time while Dr. Eaton and I walk back into the hospital.

"Thank you," I whisper as soon as we are back into my room.

"It was the least I could do for you. It wasn't even nice out. It would've been better if it was spring or summer,"

"It was the first time in many years and I can't complain," I mutter.

"Well, good night. I'll check you in and say that you've returned safely. Not many staff are working in the halls tonight. Then I might go to the simulation room. Anyways, have a good night," he says, looking at me. The door closes and I wait for the sound of a lock clicking. I put on my nightgown and continue to wait. No click. I walked up to the door and placed my hand nervously on the handle. Slowly, I turned it and watched it turn. _He didn't lock it._ ' _I'll check you in and say that you've returned safely. Not many staff are working in the halls tonight. Then I might go to the simulation room.' Could that have a double meaning? Did he include all the information because he wanted me to meet him somewhere?_ The thought of Dr. Eaton _purposefully_ leaving the door made me slightly jittery. _I could do this. I could walk to the simulation room. He wanted me there, right? Why would he leave the door unlocked and tell me where he was going?_ I took a deep breath and made my way to the door. _I'm going to do this._ I turned the handle and opened the door. _No turning back now._

 **A/N: Thank you so much for all the support :) I really appreciate all of it. Any ideas of what might happen next chapter? Any predictions for future chapters? What's your favorite color? Sorry for the short-ish chapter. Please Review (Can I get 35? Please?)! I really enjoy receiving constructive criticism on how to make my story better and helpful words inspire me.**

 **-L**


	8. Chapter 8

I creep through the hallways, Dr. Eaton's words running through my mind. ' _Not many staff are working in the halls tonight. Then I might go to the simulation room.'_ Was I looking into this too much? I hope I wasn't mistaking his words for something else. What if he really did just forget about locking the door? I try to think of an excuse to be out if someone catches me or if he didn't mean anything by it. Everything I come up with is fucking stupid. I creep down the hallways. Dr. Eaton was right, barely any staff is walking around. When I finally get to the simulation room, I think about what I was doing. _I'm a patient, walking around the hospital unsupervised because I think a doctor was trying to hint at me meeting him here._ I open the door without knocking to find Dr. Eaton holding a syringe.

"I thought you said no more simulations," I say angrily as he says,

"What are you doing here?"

"The door was unlocked," I reply.

"The simulation isn't for you," he says.

"Oh, you have other guinea pigs?"

"No! I'm going in the simulation," he says, quieting his voice. He walks toward me and shuts the door and locks it.

"Why?"

"Tris! Please lower your voice. Do you understand how much trouble we'd be in if I was caught here with you? At this hour? Alone?" He says, exasperated.

"I guess I should go then," I say, dumbly. _Tris, you stupid bitch. Why the hell did you think he wanted you to meet him here._

"Well, you're here so there's no point in sending you back," he says with a sigh. He gently pushes me out of the way of the door and drags a chair against. Maybe coming here at night, alone with him, wasn't a great idea. _No shit, Sherlock. It practically screams 'rape'. You basically walked into this._

"Is that really necessary?" I ask.

"Yes, neither of us is going to be able to hold the door if someone comes in,"

"But if you're going in the simulation, won't I be able to hold the door closed? Will I be able to see your fears?"

"Depends, do you want to come with me?" he says. I look for any trace of joking in his face but I find none. I try to find him scolding me in that sentence, mocking me, just finding a way not to be serious.

"How?" I ask.

"We'll both go in the same simulation together. It's not that hard," he says with a shrug.

"Are you sure?" I ask, uncertain of what to say.

"If you want to,"

"Why do they call you Four'?" I ask.

"Let's see if you can figure that out,"

"What's your first name?" I ask.

"Let's see if you can figure that out too," he says, "are you sure about this?" I nod and keep my mouth shut as he hooks us up to a machine and then pulls out the shots. He puts one in me and then himself. I bite my lip as the needle pierces my neck. _How does he know where to put in on himself?_ He sits down on the chair and I sit down on the hospital recliner. Suddenly I find myself on the ground. We're really high up on something that looks somewhat unstable. The wind blows against my face and it almost feels real. I stand up and look at Dr. Eaton. He looks uncomfortable and scared.

"Are you ok?" I ask.

"No," he says, gripping the small, unstable rail. His knuckles turn white and he's shaking.

"What do you need to do to move on?"

"Jump," he says in barely a whisper. Dr. Eaton looked in no position to jump.

"Together? Ok, you can do this. Don't look down," I say, looking at him straight in the eye. He fixes his shirt, straightening it out. For the first time, I realize that he's not wearing formal attire. Just a simple black t-shirt and jeans.

"One, two, three," I say, and we both jump. Suddenly, we're thrown into another room. A wall forces me to bump into Dr. Eaton. The walls are closing us in. Why are the walls closing us in? I get as far as I can from Dr. Eaton and spread my arms out, stopping the walls from shrinking. He takes deep breaths, but he's not calming down.

"Dr. Eaton," I start softly but he doesn't hear me, "Four!" I say, snapping him out of it.

"What Tris?:" he asks, his voice weak.

"We need to make it worse," I say.

"Make it worse?"

"For it to get better, it needs to get worse," I say, putting my arms down and walking closer to Dr. Eaton.

"What are you doing? Stop!" says frantically.

"Crouch down," I command, crouching down. He takes a deep breath and crouches down.

"Fuck. Why this?" he mutters under his breath.

"You need to calm your heart rate down to progress, right?" I ask.

"Y-yes," I scoot closer to him

"This box is so small," he says, gasping for breath.

"You know, a lot of guys wouldn't mind being in a small box with a girl," I mutter.

"Not claustrophobic people, Tris!"

"Do you want to talk about it, this fear I mean? Sometimes that helps," I offer, scooting so close that we're literally touching.

"Childhood punishments," he says, nervously. "My father used to lock me in our tiny closet upstairs," She nodded.

"My mother kept our winter coats in our closet," I say dumbly. _Wow Tris, don't you know how to comfort._

"Dr. Eaton, I think we need to make it worse," I say nervously. He just nods. I sit with my back against his chest and I wrap his arms around me. The box gets even smaller.

"T-try t-to," I stop and clear my throat, "Try to match your breaths and heartbeat to mine," I say, placing his hand on my heart.

"Feel my heartbeat. Can you feel it?"

"Yes," he says

"Feel how steady it is?"

"It's fast."

"Yes, well, that has nothing to do with the box," I mutter, my cheeks burning. After a few minutes, he calms down and were able to move on. I jump away from him as soon as the fear changes. A gun is placed on a table and a young girl, probably about 18 looks at him.

"Who is she?" I ask curiously.

"No one, in particular, just innocent," he says, "I have to kill her,"

"Oh," I say.

"It's okay." He nods. "I'll just…do it. This one's not…not so bad. Not as much panic involved." Not as much panic, but far more dread. I can see it in his eyes as he picks up the gun and opens the chamber like he's done it a thousand times—and maybe he has. He clicks the bullet into the chamber and holds the gun out in front of him, both hands around it. He squeezes one eye shut and breathes slowly in. As he exhales, he fires, and the woman's head whips back. I see a flash of red and look away. I hear her crumple to the floor

Suddenly, we're in a house on Abnegation Road.

"Dr. Eaton, why are we here?" I ask, looking around. All the houses on Abnegation Road are the same on the inside and outside. A dark figure moves ahead of us, creeping along the edge of the circle of light, waiting for us to take another step. _Who is it?_ The man who emerges is tall and slim, with hair cut close to his scalp. He holds his hands behind his back. And he wears gray clothes. _I know him._ The man who forced me away from my family.

"Marcus," I whisper.

"Here's the part," Dr. Eaton says, his voice shaking, "where you figure out my name."

"Is he…" I look from Marcus, who walks slowly toward us, to Dr. Eaton, who inches slowly back, and everything comes together. Marcus had a son, he came over once.

His name was…

"Tobias." Marcus shows us his hands. A belt is curled around one of his fists. Slowly he unwinds it from his fingers.

"This is for your own good," he says, and his voice echoes a dozen times. A dozen copies of Marcus press into the circle of light, all holding the same belt, with the same blank expression. The belts slither along the floor, which is now white tile. A shiver crawls up my spine. Marcus has been accused of cruelty before by many people. My father always insisted he was a good man. Very gentle, very generous, very powerful. I look at Dr. Eaton—Tobias—and he seems frozen. His posture sags. He looks years older; he looks years younger. The first Marcus yanks his arm back, the belt sailing over his shoulder as he prepares to strike. Tobias shrinks back, throwing his arms up to protect his face. I dart in front of him and the belt cracks against my wrist, wrapping around it. A hot pain races up my arm to my elbow. I grit my teeth and let out a small grunt of pain. Then, pull as hard as I can. Marcus loses his grip, so I unwrap the belt and grab it by the buckle. I swing my arm as fast as I can, my shoulder socket burning from the sudden motion, and the belt strikes Marcus's shoulder. _Oh my fucking god I can't believe I just did that._ He yells in pain, cursing, and lunges at me with outstretched hands, with fingernails that look like claws. Dr. Eaton-Four-Tobias ( _What do I call him now?)_ pushes me behind him so he stands between me and Marcus. He looks angry, not afraid. All the Marcuses vanish. Suddenly, we're snapped out of it.

"That's it?" I say. "Those were your worst fears? That's all you fear? Why do you only have four…" My voice trails off. I get up off the hospital recliner. Only four fears. "Oh." I look over my shoulder at him. "That's why they call you—" The words leave me when I see his expression. His eyes are wide and seem almost vulnerable under the room's lights. His lips are parted. If we were not here, I would describe the look as awe. But I don't understand why he would be looking at me in awe. He gets up and wraps his hand around my elbow, his thumb pressing to the soft skin above my forearm, and tugs me toward him. The skin around my wrist still stings, like the belt was real, but it is as pale as the rest of me. He buries his face in my neck, breathing against my collarbone. I stand stiffly for a second and then loop my arms around him and sigh. _Is he… hugging me?_

"Hey," I say softly. "We got through it." He lifts his head and slips his fingers through my hair, tucking it behind my ear. We stare at each other in silence. His fingers move absently over a lock of my hair.

"You got me through it," he says finally, letting me out of the hug.

"Well." My throat is dry. I try to ignore the nervous electricity that pulses through me every second he touches me. "It's easy to be brave when they're not my fears." I let my hands drop and casually wipe them on my nightgown. We sit in a silence that's neither awkward or comfortable

"So…" I latch on to the last logical thought I remember. "Four fears."

"Four fears then; four fears now," he says, nodding. "They haven't changed, so I keep going in there, but…I still haven't made any progress."

"You can't be fearless," I say. "Because you still care about things. About your life."

"I know." He says looking. Silence again.

"These are things I don't tell people, you know. Not even my friends," he says, looking me directly in the eye. I look at everything but him. _Wall. Chair. Hands. Feet. Back to Wall._ I lace my fingers together and glance up at him.

"O-ok, Dr. Eaton," I reply, not prepared for the slight shakiness of my own voice.

"Don't call me 'Dr. Eaton,' okay? It's nice to hear my name again, but only when we're alone," he says. _When we're alone? Does he mean that there will be more of these late night things?_ Something in me flutters and I find myself burning with one question.

"Did you keep my door unlocked and tell me where you were going on purpose?" I ask.

"No," he says, diverting his eyes. His hands go immediately to straighten his still perfect shirt.

" _Tobias_ you're a terrible liar," I say, a smile creeping up on my lips.

"Fine, maybe I wanted you here," he says, walking closer to me and sitting next to me on the recliner.

"Thank you," he says.

"For what?" I ask.

"Even though you found out about Marcus…" His voice softens. "You aren't giving me that look. Like I'm a kicked puppy or something."

"Well," I say. "You're not," I say firmly. I watch him lean closer to me and I freeze up. His lips make contact with my forehead.

"You should be going back to your room," he mutters. I'm pretty sure my face is burning because I can feel my heart beating in my chest.

"Yeah," I say quietly. The silence as we walk back is obvious but it isn't awkward.

"Good night," he says as I walk in. I nod as he closes the door and locks it. I try to lie down and sleep but my head keeps me awake. _Did he really kiss you? Not kiss-kiss on the lips or anything but on the forehead. Maybe it was in a comforting way? Probably? Tobias was abused as a child. He doesn't seem abusive. Well, obviously Tris! Just because someone was abused doesn't make them abusive. Why would he even show me his fear simulation? After a while, he stopped looking at my fears. Will he start looking at my fears again?_ I internally yell at my brain to shut up and after a while. I drift away.

 **A/N: Wooooo! Thank you so much for 35 reviews! I swear Tobias grew more and now he's like 6'4 which makes me feel small even though I'm pretty tall. I've been babysitting so much lately. Anyways, I have some tests to study for. Have a nice day!**

 **-L**


	9. Chapter 9

"Did you hear?" I can hear a few nurses gossiping loudly outside my door. I groan, tired from the minimal sleep I got last.

"Yeah, I can't believe Max died," said another nurse.

"Some say it was suicide but the police think it may have been murder," I hear another say, quieter now.

"Do you think it was someone from the hospital?"

"No, Max was well-liked, no?"

"He was friendly. Strict, but friendly," I groan and tune them out, flashing my mind to the memories of the night before. He _wanted_ me to go with him. It makes me slightly giddy that _someone_ wanted me to go with them somewhere. I hear a knock on the door and I immediately sit up. The lock clicks and the door swings open.

"Hi!" says a fake, cheery voice. As soon as I see her face, I know who she is. The nurse I insulted. _Oh shit._

"Hello," I say, nervously, "sorry everything I said. I wasn't in the right state of mind,"

"Oh, honey! Don't worry about it, I totally understand," she says fakely. Oh god, that sounds so melodramatic. _What was her name again?_

"I'm Tris," I say, introducing myself using my nickname.

"I know. I'm Nita but you can call me Dr. Hernández," she says. Part of me wants to test her for no real reason. I think about calling her Nita and then decide against it. _Can't have her spitting in my food._

"Ok," I say.

"Well, I was assigned to be your new nurse,"

"By Dr. Eaton?" Part of me sinks for a second.

"No, my director, Eric," she says. Part of me feels relieved and the other part feels a sense of slight panic. Didn't a guy named Eric walk in when Dr. Eat- _Tobias_ put me on the simulation?

"I thought Dr. Eaton was the director,"

"Of the therapist. Eric works in simulations and is the head of the nurses,"

"Oh,"

"So, what do you plan on doing today?" she asks. _What the hell do you think I do?_

"I'm usually not allowed to leave this room,"

"Oh, wow! I wish I didn't have any responsibilities like you," _Ouch._

"Uh," I reply dumbly.

"I just love how you don't care how you come across. I would be mortified if I had to show myself first thing with even brushing my hair," she says with a laugh.

"Well you've had a very different life than mine," I reply flatly.

"You're right honey, you've had a very difficult life. I sometimes forget I'm talking with a real adult when I'm with you," she says with hints of sarcasm in her voice and a small laugh, feigning innocence.

"Ok," I say, resisting the urge to tell her to fuck off. I want to strangle her right now. A knock on the door interrupts her one-sided altercation. Tobias walks in and looks between Nita and me.

"Dr. Eaton! Beatrice and I were just talking. I'll leave you two alone to talk," she says, sweetening her voice. She bats her eyes at me and gives him a smile before leaving. As the door closes, Tobias immediately looks at me.

"Are you ok?" he asks.

"Yes," I lie.

"Really? Because you look

"Fine," I tell him. His eyes turn concerned.

"What did she say to you?" he asks.

"Nothing, it's fine,"

"I'm supposed to help you go throu-"

"Just drop it," I say louder. He takes a step back, his face holding a colder expression.

"Fine, I'll leave you alone," He leaves the room and I can almost feel my loneliness punch me in the stomach for saying what I said.

 _alone:_

 _adjective_

 _\ ə-ˈlōn\_

 _Definition of alone_

 _(Entry 1 of 2)_

1: separated from others: _isolated_

 _2_ _ **:**_ _exclusive of anyone or anything else_ _ **:**_ _only_

 _3a_ _ **:**_ _considered without reference to any other_

 _b_ _ **:**_ _incomparable_ _,_ _unique_

 _adverb_

 _Definition of alone (Entry 2 of 2)_

 _1_ _ **:**_ _solely_ _,_ _exclusively_

 _2_ _ **:**_ _without aid or support_

I close the dictionary I had been given off of request. Yup, alone described me. Suddenly, I was shaking and I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. _I'm alone. I'm all alone. I've always been alone. I need to get out._ I frantically press the therapist button over and over again. _I just need someone, anyone, to be here._ I must've pressed it over a hundred times before Dr. Eaton unlocked the door. _Now! Go now!_ My body urged me to run as fast as I could, out the door and into freedom.

"Tris, what happe-" Dr. Eaton began, but I went past him and out the door. _Oh my god, I just did that._ I run through nurses avoiding the people trying to calm me down, despite being pretty out of shape, I get through a few hallways without anyone catching me. A woman's hand wraps around my arm. I kick her but her wrap is unbreakable.

"Johanna Reyes? I mean, Dr. Reyes! Tris! Beatrice! What are you doing?" asks Tobias, confused and flustered while silently saying 'excuse me' or 'sorry' to everyone he bumped to try to catch me.

"Your patient needs to be put on P.S." Dr. Reyes says looking at Tobias.

"What's P.S.?" I ask. _Oh god, are they going to put me down? Is that the name of a poison? I still need to get out._

"Peace Serum is somewhat appropriate for this case," Dr. Eaton says looking at me. I notice that I must've bruised Dr. Reyes's leg while kicking at it. A number of people are staring at me as I continue to struggle.

"Please," I beg, "let me go,"

"I need some help here," says Dr. Reyes. I can see Zeke come over and hold my hands behind my back.

"Sorry, Tris. I have to," he whispers apologetically.

"You don't _have_ to do shit," I mumble. Zeke is quiet, surprised by my response. I'm sat down in a room with Dr. Reyes. She takes a few moments to help calm me down.

"Zeke, you can leave," she says after I'm done and my face has turned a little less red.

"Beatrice Prior, do you understand why you're here?" she asks.

"Yes," I answer. I feel like a five-year-old.

"Now, I'm going to assign my nurse to give you something called _Peace Serum._ It will help calm you down," she says.

"Ok," I say, slightly skeptical. As the nurse by her injects it into me, I can almost feel myself relaxing.

"You have really pretty hair," I say with a giggle to Dr. Reyes.

"Thank you, Beatrice. Grace, take her back to her room," Dr. Reyes says.

"Yes, Dr. Reyes," she says, "follow me," I follow behind her with a stupid smile on my face.

"Today's a beautiful day!" I say loudly. _Wow, the flowers in the hospital are so pretty._

"It is," Grace says while walking. When we reach my room I frown.

"Awww, I don't wanna go there," I whine.

"How about when we go in there I'll call someone over and you guys can play a game" she offers. I think about for a while.

"Sure, you're really nice," I say. She opens the door and I hug her tightly which catches her by surprise. She comes inside with me and presses the therapist button.

 **A/N: Next chapter will probably be pretty long. I hope you liked this chapter. Please leave a review telling me what you think might happen or if you have any ideas for this story. Thank you so much for averaging about 5 reviews a chapter (that's awesome!). I have some studying to get to now... Fun. Bye!**

 **-L**


	10. Chapter 10

As soon as Dr. Eaton comes, my smile widens.

"Thanks," he says looking at Grace.

"No problem. Bye Beatrice," she says, exiting the room.

"Fo-ur," I say with a small giggle, "wait! I mean Tobias, right?"

"Tris?" he says looking at me reluctantly.

"Who else?" I say with a laugh. _He's really funny._

"What did the-" he begins but I pull him into a hug. I let out a long sigh. Why isn't he hugging me too? I pull back from the hug.

"That was lame," I say. He looks at me, confused, "Ok, no. It was not but-" he cuts me off by holding up his hand.

"Tris," he begins, "What did they do to you? You're acting like a lunatic," he says. His face turns white, probably from using the forbidden 'l' word.

"That's not very nice of you to say," I say with a pout. I can't hold it for more than a few seconds so I break back into a smile.

"Anyways, you said I was crazy before. They just put me in a really good mood,"

"I'm going to figure out what's going on," he says calmly while standing up. _Wait! I know now._

"That's why you like me!" I exclaim with a happy smile. He raises his eyebrow and his face slightly flushes.

"What?" He asks.

"Because you're not very nice either! It makes so much sense now," I sing. Wow, I'm really smart.

"That's it, we're going to see Dr. Reyes now. Follow me," he says.

"I like you too," I sing loudly, but I don't move.

"Encouraging. Now please get up," he says more flushed now.

 _Dr. Eaton's POV:_

Tris follows behind me slowly, stumbling with each step, a crazy grin planted on her face. Why does she seem drunk? That's definitely not what the Peace Serum is supposed to do. _Maybe they gave her too much?_ She is quite petite, only 5'5, and according to her last weighing, she weighs 112 pounds. Idiots must've not taken her height and weight into account. She's many feet behind me so I stop walking.

"Tris, can you walk a little faster?" I ask kindly. She's not paying attention to me though. She's intensely staring at a flower.

"Grow, flower, grow," I can hear her mutter as I get closer.

"C' mon, Tris," I say as if I was talking to a 7-year-old.

"Ok! Bye little flower bud! Grow up soon!" Then she continues with her slow, drunk-like walk.

"Oh for God's sake. Just wait here. I need to get you a wheelchair," I say. I quickly get a wheelchair and make my way back to her. _Surprise, surprise, she's not there._

"Tris?" I say, slightly panicking. _I just lost another human being. Another human being that's not in the right mindset. A human being prone to making a fool of herself. A hot huma- Shut up brain and think rationally._

"No! I have never ever, ever had alcohol!" I can hear a loud female voice say. _Oh god._ Part of me wishes that she is talking to a kind elderly lady or at least someone who would understand.

"You're totally hammered. Why don't you tell me your name?" Well fuck. _Eric._ I scan the room before finally seeing him.

"Tris," she says loudly.

"How about we get outta here? Maybe come ov-"

"Get. Away. From. Her. Now," I say through gritted teeth.

"Why? Is she your girl?"

"No, but-"

"Then no problem," he says with a smirk.

"She's a patient here at the hospital,"

"So she's a psycho all the time?"

"No, she's just on very heavy medicine right now-"

"Looking at her, I could've sworn she was one of your students,"

"Why do you have so many piercings in your face?" Tris asks, speaking for the first time.

"What?" he asks looking at her.

"Why do you have so many piercings in your face? I mean you look scary with them. You would look almost as hot as-" I pull her away cutting her off.

"We need to go now," I say looking at Eric. He smirks at me and glances at Tris. I help her into the wheelchair and then as quickly, and safely, as possible, I rush to Dr. Reyes.

"Weee! This is so fun!" she squeals as I push her.

"Listen, let me do the talking," I say to her as we stand outside Dr. Reyes's office.

"Mkay," she says. _Please just keep your mouth shut at all times._

"Dr. Reyes," I say opening the door.

"Dr. Eaton," she says, her eyes flitting between me and Tris.

"I think your nurse gave too much P.S. to Tris. I think she's been given too much," I say.

"Roses are red, violets are blue, a face like yours belongs in a zoo, don't worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you," Tris sings quietly, giggling.

"I see your concerns. Don't worry, P.S. doesn't have any negative side effects if given a little too much. She'll just have to let it wear off. I'm sorry, my nurse should've been more exact and taken her weight and height into account,"

"It's fine. Thank you, Dr. Reyes," I say, defeated. I push Tris back to her room and decide that it's best if I just let her be there alone until it wears off. I can feel someone watching me as I lock her door but I ignore it. I sit in my office, looking at my night schedule today. I have two appointments for fear simulations today, each an hour long. I hear a knock on my door and watch as Eric walks in.

"What do you want?" I saw, glaring at him.

"I just wanted to say 'hi'. No need to be so defensive _Dr. Eaton_ ," he mocks.

"What do you want?" I ask again.

"Well if I'm being honest, I'm just wondering," he lowers his voice, "why you're fucking your own patients?"

"Excuse me?" I get up, a look him in the eye. He's doing it to taunt me and I know it.

"I'm just saying maybe all those rumors were true. Four fears, four inches. Never could get a good bitch for a night? Sad to see you've lowered your expectations to psychos," My hands curl into fists. _Don't hit him. Don't hit him. He's not worth it. He's not worth it._

"If you don't have any serious questions or concerns, I'm going to have to have to ask you to leave," My blood boils as I say those words.

"Sure. Have a good one, _Dr. Eaton_ ," He says, carrying a smirk as he exits my room. I count to ten a few times and take a few deep breaths.

"He's not worth it," I mutter out loud.

 _Beatrice POV:_

Everything about this room makes me smile. The blue on the walls is happy. The bed's plush and happy. _Wow, I'm so lucky to have such a nice room._

"You know what would make this room better?" I say out loud, "Elvis!"

"The warden threw a party in the county jail. The prison band was there and they began to wail. The band was jumpin' and the joint began to swing. You should've heard them knocked-out jailbirds sing. Let's rock everybody, let's rock. Everybody in the whole cell block. Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock," I sing loudly, letting out a giggle at each sentence. _Oh, I'm so happy? When did I last laugh like this? This is great._

 _Dr. Eaton POV:_

 _~FOUR HOURS LATER~_

I knock on her door and open it to find her sitting normally, her face straight.

"Oh thank god," I say with a sigh loudly.

"Hi," she says weakly. I hope she isn't on a low because of the medicine. She could easily get addicted.

"Hello, do you remember what happened?" I ask, sitting down.

"Mhm," she says, looking at the ground.

"Ok, do you want me to take you to visit your flower plant," I say jokingly.

"Shut your mouth," she mumbles.

"That's not very nice. Don't worry, I'm not very nice either," I say, quoting her the best I can. Her eyes widen and I let out a laugh.

"Shut up! I was highly drugged with the Peace Serum thing!" she says. I laugh harder at her.

"If you're done insulting me, is there any reason you want to be here?" she says looking up at me.

"No," I say too quickly.

 _Beatrice POV:_

"So you came here to insult me?" I say. _Time to mess with him._

"N-no! That's-" he says, getting slightly flustered.

"Really? 'Cause that what it seems like me," I say. He looks like he feels bad

"Tris," he begins.

"I have a question," I say.

"Yes?" he says.

"Do you like Nita?" I say quirking my eyebrows.

"First of all, my love life is none of your business. Second, no,"

"Really? Is that why you moved her to be my nurse?" I fire back.

"She's your new nurse? Fuck, now have to deal with-" his eyes widen, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to say that,"

"You can curse," I say.

"It is not professional," he explains. I snort at his explanation.

"Really? So taking a patient in the middle of the night in your fears is professional, Tobias?" I say.

"That was a one-time thing and please don't say that so loudly,"

"I'm pretty sure putting your patients through fear simulations illegally isn't professional either," I mutter.

"Fine, maybe I'm not _that_ professional," he admits.

"So, who assigned Nita then?" I ask.

"I'm not sure. Maybe she was directed to this unit or maybe my father specifically put or here. Maybe she applied to be here? I'm not sure, Tris. I'll do my best to change her if you feel troubled by her," I have an idea, a childish one, but an idea nonetheless.

"No, no, it's fine," _Nita is in for a surprise._

"Do you want to talk about anything?" he asks. I think for a second before answering.

"What's your biggest wish in life?"

"What makes you ask such a serious and philosophical question?"

"I don't know. Hearing other people's dreams make me feel better about not being able to have any," I say with a shrug.

"Probably personal happiness. I don't know, it's a complex question. How about you?" He says after a while.

"Travel back in time and try not to act so ' _divergent'_ " I say instantly.

"Oh, well I can't do that," he says with a small laugh.

"Were you planning on granting one of my wishes?"

"Maybe if it was doable,"

"Doable meaning?" I say.

"I could do it with a slight chance of getting in trouble,"

"Oh,"

"While we're talking about me possibly being your personal genie, I made a phone call recently," he says. _Phone call? Why would he want to tell me about a phone call?_

"Ok," I say.

"Turns out Natalie Prior hasn't ever changed her phone number," I sit up straighter.

"What?"

"Remember when we were talking about me hypothetically talking about calling the random number you gave me? Well, I decided to call it,"

"A-are you messing with me?" I say. _He was talking to my mom! He was talking to MY MOM!_

"No, but she kept on talking about her daughter. Talking about how much she misses her. How much she wants to see her again. How much she loves her," he says softly, "must be nice to know someone cares that much about you," For a second, I swear I can see sadness in his eyes but it quickly washes away into a small smile. I just don't know what to say and I can feel myself overwhelming with emotions. _My mom! My mom still loves me!_ I pull him into an unexpected embrace. Part of me wonders if this ok or at least appropriate. I can almost feel his awkwardness as he hugs me.

"Was that lame?" he asks as I release him.

"I thought you were done making jokes about me," I say as he smiles.

"You know," he begins, "you can't tell anyone about this. What I'm doing is not allowed," he says, his face turning serious. _Oh god, why does that sound so sexual?_ I attempt to keep a straight face and nod.

"I have a question," I say as something comes to my mind.

"Go ahead," he says.

"If I happen to get out of here, what do you think will happen to me?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I don't have an education and I'd need to get into a college,"

"Then I'd guess we'd make sure you're alright for a while and then you'd be on your own,"

"How old are you again?"

"Guess," he says with a smile.

"45," I say with a smile.

"Seriously?"

"Ok, I think you're 30,"

"Oh god, do I really look that old?"

"How old are you then, Tobias?"

"26, Tris. 26," he says.

"Oh,"

"Yeah, I'm pretty new at the hospital,"

"Are you a gifted child?"

"I guess some could say that,"

"You're a fucking doctor at 26,"

"I went to medical school in another country and got out of high school pretty early,"

"Model child and you're a doctor," I say.

"I never said I was a model child," The room goes quiet and he gets up, "I should get going. Bye, Tris,"

"Bye," I say as he leaves. I wait, almost wanting the door to not lock. I let out a sigh as I hear it lock. _He said it was a one-time thing so what was I expecting?_ I lay down, wanting to fall asleep. _If I can't escape here, I can escape in my mind._

 **A/N: That was about 2000+ words. I wrote this while babysitting which feels like all I'm ever doing this year. Finals are coming up and I'm drowning in stuff to study. I have to have a high GPO. I'm gonna have to start updating a little less soon. I have a lot of ideas for this story but if you have any ideas, please PM me or leave a review. Thanks!**

 **-L**


	11. Chapter 11

A loud knock on the door wakes me up. _Why?_

"Tris! I brought you dinner," says a high pitched voice. _Not what I need right now._

"Thanks," I say dryly, sitting up.

"No problem, here let me sit with you!" She says pulling over a chair.

"You don't have to," I say. She locks the door and smiles widely.

"Actually, I was ordered to so I technically have to," she says keeping her fake smile.

"Oh," I say dumbly. Did she have to say that? I start slowly eating as she watches me.

"Are you really going to eat that much?"

"Huh?" _Maybe I heard her wrong._

"I said, are you really going to eat that much?"

"Why does that concern you?"

"Well, I mean, as a girl you're supposed to be fit. I don't see you exercising and that's a lot of food," I feel like she's just slapped me in the face.

"Maybe you need to stop talking about all the calories I'm eating," I say flatly.

"I ju-"

"No," I say cutting her off, "you need to stop. I know what you're doing,"

"Honey, I was just saying it because I care," I know exactly what she's doing and I'm not going to let her win. Part of my mind wants me to acknowledge that she is right.

"Why are you like this?" I say, losing my appetite.

"Like what?" she says.

"You can take this, I'm not hungry," I say looking at my mostly full tray. She smiles and takes it away, locking the door. _I let her win._ Anger and sadness bubble up inside of me and hot tears flow down my cheeks. I don't bother wiping them and just let myself cry. I don't want to be here anymore. I hear a quiet knock on my door and quickly try to wipe off all of my tears. _If they see you cry, they win._ I plant a small smile on my face as the door opens. Part of me is relieved it's Tobias and not Nita and the other part is dying because he'll know I was crying.

"Tris, I need you to eat more you-" he stops midway in his sentence and I don't bother looking at him.

"I'm," I clear my voice. It was so weak, "I'm not hungry,"

"Are you ok, Tris?" He says quietly, sitting down.

"Yeah,"

"Are you sure? Are you sick?"

"I'm fine!" I say loudly. He's quiet for a few minutes. _I feel like an asshole now. I should really work on my delivery of words._

"Is Nita saying anything to you?"

"No," I say too quickly. _Damn it. Slower delivery._

"Look at me Tris," he says gently tipping my head up so my eyes meet his, "every time Nita leaves this room, you're either sad or angry. Have you been crying?" I can feel myself bubbling up with sadness. Part of me wants to yell at him to leave so he doesn't see me cry. Another part just wants to let everything out.

"I just don't like being here very much," I say, "no offense,"

"None taken," he replies. I can tell he's slightly relieved but I'm not sure if it's because he wants to believe what I'm saying or he actually thinks that's the problem. _Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry, Tris._

"Ok," I say.

"I brought you something. Well, two things," he says softly.

"You didn't have to," I automatically respond.

"I figured you were a little sick of the hospital food. I convinced the hospital to let you have something a little more unhealthy. You know, to raise calories and keep you at a healthy weight,"

"Huh?" _What does he mean?_ He opens the door and a new nurse carries in a huge piece of chocolate cake.

"Thank you so much, Shauna," he says as she gives me the tray and leaves.

"Thank you," I say.

"Please at least eat this," he pleads.

"I'm not hungry," I say. My stomach growls loudly, contradicting my words.

"Well, clearly your stomach says otherwise,"

"This was really nice of you," I say, picking up the fork.

"Tris, I have a question," he says, "please be honest,"

"Shoot," I say, putting a small bite in my mouth. _Oh god, who made this cake. I guess food overpowers self-control._

"Are you anorexic?" he asks. He's not being rude about it, though.

"I-I don't think I am," I stammer.

"It's understandable that you don't eat considering you are stuck in this room all day. But you can't not eat," he says.

"Your hospital should enforce a fitness program or something," I can see something light up in his face.

"You're right! I gotta tell my Marcus- er my dad," he says getting up excitedly.

"Are you serious?" I ask.

"Yes, Tris! Wait, before I go I had one last present. Just wait here!"

"I'm not going anywhere," I mutter. _What could he be getting?_ He brings in a small vase and fills it slightly with water. He puts what looks like sugar or salt in it and what smells like vinegar.

"What are you doing?" I ask. I could've sworn I've seen someone doing this before. He lastly brings out a bright rose with the thorns removed. He places it inside the small vase and smiles.

"I thought you'd like it. I checked the rule book and there was nothing against this," he says. I stare at the rose. _It's so pretty._

"Thank you," I whisper. _Why is he being so nice to me? Jeanine was never like this._

"Mhm,"

"Why?"

"What do you mean?" he says looking at me.

"Why are you doing this for me?" Something about him acting so nice makes me uneasy. _Nobody ever does anything for free._

"As your therapist," he begins, lifting my chin with one finger so my eyes meet his, "it's my job to make sure you're happy. Anyways, I like seeing you smile,"

"O-ok," I say, blushing. _He's standing really close to me._ He takes a step back and awkwardly straightens his shirt.

"I have to go now before I forget your idea," he says with a smile as he leaves the room. As he leaves and locks the door I smile brightly. I feel unusually bubbly as I stare at the rose. I gently touch its petals, gasping slightly when I realize it's real. I almost didn't believe that I have a _real rose_ in my area. My perfect moment is ruined when a loud knock snaps me out of my daydream.

"Hey, Tris," Nita says happily. I frown at her.

"Hi," I say flatly. I can see her eyeing the rose.

"I heard Dr. Eaton was here. Do you know where he is now?" she asks, eyes on the rose.

"He was in here but I don't know where he is now,"

"That's a pretty flower. Are you allowed to have that?" she says, her voice laced with sweet poison.

"I think," _She better not take it._

"Tris, I don't want you to get in trouble. I should probably take it-"

"No," I say cutting her off.

"Honey, it might be dangerous," she says calmly. _She wants me to fight._

"It's _mine_ ," I say weakly. _Don't fight with her. Don't fucking fight with her._

"Well, not anymore. See you later Tris," she says, swooping up the vase and slamming the door, locking it behind her. I stare at the door. _What did I do to her? Why is she doing this to me?_

 **A/N: What do you think is gonna happen? Thanks for reading. Your reviews, favorites, and follows mean a lot me :) Anyone who reviews on this chapter will get a shoutout next chapter! If you're a guest and don't put any name, I'll have to group you together (Sorry:( ). Everyone have a great day!**

 **-L**

 **P.S.:**

 **Almost forgot! Good Luck to everyone fasting for Ramadan! Hope your fast is going well.**


	12. Chapter 12

_Dr. Eaton POV:_

 _~SEVEN DAYS LATER~_

I let out a large sigh as I expect the meeting room. I can't believe my father actually listened to my idea about incorporating a fitness and yoga program into our hospital for patients in the ward. The first thought that comes into my mind is Tris. _She's gonna be so happy to hear about this._ In order to put together the presentation, a substitute therapist had to be given to Tris. Nita pops into my mind and how Tris always seems unhappy after seeing her. I tap a nearby nurse on the shoulder.

"Do you know where Nita is. Nita Hernández?" I ask.

"I think she's at her office right now. Room 150B," the nurse replies.

"Thank you," I say with a small smile. Walk in the hall, looking for 150B. _148B, 149B, 150B!_ I knock on the door twice before letting myself in. Nita is one of the lead nurses at the hospital so she has her own small office. I can see her face light up as I enter.

"Nita," I say.

"Hey, Four," she purrs and gives what I think is supposed to be a seductive smile. She comes so close to me that I'm tempted to hold out my arm and tell her to stand an arm's length away. Instead, I take a small step back.

"I'm here to inquire abou-" my eyes catch a vase on her desk. A vase with a single rose that has begun wilting. A blue vase with a single rose. A blue vase I specifically bought to match with Tris's room. A rose I picked out.

"Go on," she says, surprised with my sudden stop.

"Why do you have that?" I ask.

"Have what?" she says.

"The vase with the rose," I say through gritted teeth.

"Oh," she says with a laugh, "I found that in a patient's room. She shouldn't have that! It's really bad of her to find someone to give that to her. They could get fired,"

"I gave that to her," I say. Nita's eyes widen as I say that sentence.

"Well maybe you should waste such a nice rose and vase on someone so unimportant," she says condescendingly.

"You're right," I reply flatly, "Except I didn't give it to you. You took it,"

"What? It was for the patient's good," she stutters, shocked and surprised.

"I want you to bring Tr- _Beatrice_ the rose and apologize for taking it. I checked the rules, she's technically allowed to have it," _Has Tris had to put up with her?_

"But she's," she leans in, " _Divergent_ ," she whispers.

"Being Divergent doesn't make you mentally insane. Apologize to her now,"

"Four, I'm so sorry," she says fakely, touching my cheek. I grab her hand and remove it from my cheek.

"Please don't touch me,"

"Fine," she says with a pout.

 _Beatrice POV:_

I'm fucking tired of this new therapist I'm assigned. _Maybe Tobias is leaving and wanted to give me a gift before he left. Fucking Nita stole it._ I feel terrible thinking that Tobias is leaving. _Maybe that's why he took so many risks?_ I want to cry. Nita is my nurse. A stupid therapist named Dr. Stone is trying to help me but isn't being helpful at all. He can't stop talking about his own life which I was happy to hear at first, but he started talking to me about his marriage problems. Guess how helpful I was with his relationship problems? Yup, not at all.

"Beatrice," Dr. Stone says, pulling me out of my daydream.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Are you listening? Listening is a very important skill to have these days," I tune out of his rambling about the perks of listening.

"I'm incredibly sorry for not listening. But I am feeling quite tired now. Would it be ok if I rest a little? We can talk later," I say politely.

"Well I guess that would be alright," he says with a deep sigh. _What did I do to you?_

"Thank you,"

"I have one last, slightly personal question before I go," _What does he mean?_

"Shoot,"

"How do you keep up the acting?" he asks lowering his voice.

"What do you mean?" I ask looking at him strangely.

"It's so awesome. You're pretending to be _divergent_ to get a free ride. No school. No rent. You got it all!"

"Excuse me?" I say through gritted teeth.

"I mean, you're too normal to be divergent. Everyone knows that they are dangerous and deadly to society," He holds up his hand as if expecting a high five. I can feel something mean seething inside of me. I start to laugh for no real reason and he joins me. My sudden laughter stops until I'm overwhelmed with anger. _Does how hard it's been? No friends? Taken away?_

"Get out," I say a little too calmly. _Deep breathes in and out. You don't wanna be put on peace serum, do you?_

"What?" he says as if he's stumped.

"Where is To- _Dr. Eaton_?" I ask quietly.

"I'm just a substitute so I'll be here as long as he needs me to be. I might even become your official doctor," he says with a laugh. My hands curl into fists and my knuckles crack.

"Really," I say. His eyes dart from my hands to my eyes to the door.

"I should get going now, bye!" he says quickly leaving. I want to scream loudly but I can't. Stupid idiot. I hope I never see him again. Someone knocks on my door and I stare at it with insurmountable hate.

"Hi Beatrice," says Nita. _Great._ I glance at her hands which hold _my_ vase.

"Hi," I say nervously. _Is she gonna give it back?_

"Hi," says a voice from behind her. _Tobias?_

"You're back?" Is all I can bring myself to say. I want to cry out of happiness. Am I gonna watch Nita swallow her pride, apologize, and return the vase? I smile at her as she places the vase back where it was.

"I'm sorry for taking it," she says through clenched teeth, "it wasn't mine to take,"

"It's fine," I say.

"Thank you, Nita. You can leave. I'm sorry that you had to deal with that Beatrice" he says.

"Where were you?" I ask.

"I got it approved, the fitness thing. It might take a while but my father thinks it will be good for the hospital," he says with a smile.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I also have you due for a social interaction session. It's supposed to boost morale if you talk with a volunteer. We have found a stranger for you to interact with. We will monitor you and her, your conversations. Keep everything friendly with her and at the end, I guess a hug will be ok. Remember, this will be a stranger, you don't know them. Edith Wright is your volunteer listener. She's a stranger and not supposed to know you," _Oh god is he going to show someone I know? I can only act friendly with them. I've heard the last name Wright before but I'm forgetting how._

"O-ok," I say nervously. He leads me to a bright room with windows. It screams ' _hope'_ and ' _love'_ but I don't think either is actually inside the ward.

"Beatrice, meet Edith Wright. Edith, this is Beatrice. I'll leave you alone now," he says looking between her and I. she takes a seat so I take the one across from her. She wears a headscarf and cloth covers everything but her eyes. _My mother wore a headscarf._ Part of me wonders why she's wearing so much clothing but I don't ask. _Maybe she's a nun?_

"Hello, Beatrice," she says. I stare at her, trying to figure out where I've heard her voice. _She looks so familiar._

"Hi," I stutter.

"You're probably wondering why I'm wearing all this," she says kindly. _Crap, was I staring for too long?_

"Yeah, actually my mom wore a headscarf,"

"She did," she says looking at me before quickly saying, "she did?"

"Yeah,"

"Well, I do this for religious reasons. It's called a niqab," she says.

"Have we met before?" I ask looking at her closely.

"No, honey. Otherwise, we wouldn't be able to meet now," her words say no but I swear her eyes scream yes. I use all my thinking power to analyze everything I know about her. _She's a stranger. Remember, she's a stranger. Why was Tobias so fixated on making sure I know she's a stranger? Where do I know the last name Wright from?_ Then it pops into my brain. _Natalie Wright._

"Wright," I say looking at her.

"How are you doing today?" she asks.

"No! I mean," I lower my voice, "do you know Natalie Wright? Natalie Prior?"

"I'm sorry, I don't," she says looking at me.

"Oh,"

"That's ok, honey. It's difficult to be brave here," she says.

"How are you?" I say, defeated.

"I'm ok, how are you?"

"I guess I'm fine,"

"That's great! Is everyone treating you well here?" she asks.

"Yeah," I say lying.

"Do you miss your family?" she asks softly.

"Yes, but I don't think my parents are together anymore,"

"I'm so sorry," I can see a tear slip under the fabric that covers her face.

"Excuse me," Dr. Eaton says entering the room, "that's all the time I can give you,"

"Be brave, Beatrice," she says giving me a swift, professional hug. I can't concentrate on the hug. Her words hit me hard. _Be brave._ I stare at her in disbelief and she gives me a subtle nod, almost to validate my assumption.

"Mo-" I begin.

"Beatrice we have to go. Someone, escort Mrs. Wright to the door," he orders. _No, we still have more to say. I can't fight, then I'll never be allowed to do this again._

 **A/N: YESSSSS! School is out! This story might go on hiatus though because I'm gonna be doing a lot this summer (work-wise). If it does go on an unexpected hiatus, just assume I'll be back at the end of summer/beginning of the school year.**

 **Thank you to the following people for reviewing on the last chapter(please note that some of these people are authors and you should seriously consider checking out their content):**

 **Not So Cliche**

 **Jamko-Zammielover**

 **goldensnitch1**

 **Guest**

 **India**

 **Wrenlovesreading**

 **Caliboo**


	13. Chapter 13

I sit on my bed and Tobias closes the door.

"How was it?" he asks.

"Ok, how the hell did you do that?! Why didn't you just tell me who she was? I wouldn't have been so damn confused! I don't know why I'm yelling. Thank you!" I yell, my emotions mixing in a rather weird way. _I'm so freaking stupid I just gave him a million different emotions. Oh god I hope he doesn't think I'm bipolar._ I take a few deep breaths to try and call myself wrong.

"Tris, are you ok?" he asks.

"What does it look like, Tobias?" I say looking him in the eye.

"You seem angry and happy and desperate. I'm unable to locate any set of emotions that usually fit together,"

"I can't find any set emotions in you either! You go from friendly to polite to 'Dr. Eaton mode' to Tobias and you keep on switching,"

"Can you please elaborate?" he says.

"There's 'Dr. Eaton the therapist' again!"

"What makes Tobias different from Dr. Eaton?"

"Dr. Eaton asks open-ended questions and gives no advice whatsoever. Dr. Eaton is more of a therapist than a friend. _Tobias_ isn't afraid to give advice. He asks more specific questions that don't sound like they've been taken from a book made to help people with mental disorders. And most importantly, Tobias doesn't use the biggest, fanciest, words in the most thought out and generic sentences ever," I explain.

"I think you're suffering from withdrawal," Tobias says looking at me. I blink twice. _What?_

"Withdrawal from what?"

"Peace Serum. We were giving you small doses of it in your bread. Today we didn't give you any. A side-effect is uncontrollable emotions which you probably are experiencing,"

"Oh,"

"Anyways, you just saw someone important to you who you haven't gotten a chance to see in years. That can trigger-," he stops himself mid-sentence and rethinks what he's about to say, "I think anyone would react as you did if they had experienced something like that. It's not every day you see a parent you haven't seen in forever,"

"How's the fitness program running along?" I ask, desperate to change the topic.

"It's going great. I have a list of exercises for all different types of patients. We also might have a martial arts program but just basic stuff. I am qualified to teach that so-" he says animatedly but I have to cut him off.

"You do martial arts?" I say looking at him. He _did_ look like he did martial arts. Part of my brain thinks back to when he was wearing a t-shirt in the fear simulation. _Yup, definitely looks like he does martial arts._

"Yes," he responds.

"That's so cool! Are you Batman level or like goldfish level?" I ask.

" _Goldfish level_?" he asks with a snort.

"I meant, like, new to it,"

"No, I've been doing it for quite a while,"

"That's awesome. Anyways, continue," I say.

"So, I'm going to be teaching the martial arts program. We got a yoga teacher and found some more space. We have an open yard so we can have exercise equipment and activities there," he says.

"I have a question," I say.

"Shoot,"

"Can we go outside?"

"Sure,"

"What?" I asked, shock apparent on my face.

"Sorry, that wasn't a good joke to make. That was rude, I wasn't thinking," he says looking at the ground.

"Well, maybe it's just your normal response," I reply.

"Huh? Elaborate,"

"Well if a normal person asked you if they could go outside, you'd say sure,"

"I guess, but it was still not nice," he persists.

"So, when does this program start?"

"A few months, but we're trying to choose patients to do a test run with the trainers and exercises in general,"

"How do you choose what patients do the test run?"

"Well, we evaluate their health, we try to judge their physical capability, and make sure that they are mentally stable,"

"Are divergents considered mentally stable?"

"They're considered mentally stable until they're found out," Dr. Eaton says, this face straightening.

"Found out? What do you mean?"

"Well, because some people don't want to be thrown into a hospital, they 'hide' their divergence. Society then proceeds to see them as normal. I don't see why divergents are different. They just have a genetic mutation that causes the amount they can use their brain to rise," he says, talking quietly.

"But why is that dangerous?"

"Divergent people are stronger than the average the person, smarter. They can resist simulations,"

"I get that, but why is that bad?" I demand. He leans closer than he's ever had before softly whispering,

"The government sometimes uses simulations to control people. If they can't control you, they try to hold you back," I hadn't realized I'd been holding my breath until he moved away and I could breathe again.

"How do you know so much about them?" I ask quietly.

"Mostly because of my father. Anyways, I have to ask you to do something you might not like," he says.

"Like…?"

"Simulations-" I cut him off.

"No,"

"Please hear me out. This time, we're going to do things differently. I'm going to train you how to overcome them, rather than just dumping you into them. You choose if you want to do the simulations and in return, I'll give you something you want that's within reasonable limits. One simulation session is equivalent to one favor," I think over it, trying to way my options.

"Anything within limits, right?" I say, trying to confirm.

"Yes,"

"Define limits,"

"I can't free you from the hospital. I can't give you anything dangerous, like weapons. I can't-" he hesitates for a second, "put you to sleep. I can let you eat almost anything that's food. I'm not sure what you want. I guess I'll have to make up a little bit as I go," he says.

"Deal,"

"Really?"

"Yes, as long as you stay true to your promise," I hold out my hand with a smile. I'm surprised when he hugs me.

"When do you want to start. We can start as early as tonight,"

"Ok," I say, slightly giddy.

"I'm guessing you know what to do," he says smiling.

"I remember," I know my way to the simulations room.

"Great. What do you think you want your first favor to be?"

"Fire Nita," I say without thinking. Both shock and glee were present on his face.

"Really?"

"Wait, no. That would be mean. Just change my, nurse, please," I say, thinking over my decisions. _No matter how terrible she is, I don't want her to lose her job. What if she has a family she supports?_

"I think Shauna wouldn't mind working in her place," he mutters.

"Who's Shauna?" I ask.

"Remember the person who brought you the cake?" I nod, "that's her,"

"Oh, didn't Zeke talk about her?" My mind reverting to when Zeke was playing music by Elvis.

"Yes,"

"Speaking of Zeke, where did he go?" I ask.

"For his shift, he stands pretty close to your room all the time,"

"Really? How come I never see him then?"

"He's a security guard, he can't enter this room without my permission,"

"Oh. Is he working now?"

"Yes,"

"That's cool. When are his shifts?"

"Depends on the day?"

"Is he allowed to come in here and talk to me with total supervision?"

"Well, maybe. Probably if I stood outside the door,"

"Can I see him or at least talk to him?"

"I guess I could work that out,"

"Does he play any sports?"

"Why?"

"You're friends and you look like you could do similar sports,"

"Well, he likes soccer,"

"Can you tell me a little about soccer?"

"You kick the ball around on a field and try to score into another team's goal," he replies sarcastically.

"Real helpful,"

"I don't know much about soccer,"

"Does he watch any sports?"

"Soccer, basketball, football, basically anything,"

"Ok, what about his brother? Is he ok?"

"Yes, he's fine now. They're finished testing him and they've declared him 'normal'"

"That's good,"

"Yeah,"

"How did they do that?"

"Ran him through a series of test,"

"Can you tell me about Shauna?"

"What's your fascination with, Zeke?" he asks rather sharply.

"If you haven't noticed Tobias, I don't have many friends here. I'm taking what I can get. And also, I just asked about Shauna," I respond, using a similar tone. He stays quiet, giving me a look that's neither apologetic nor angry.

"Shauna is a topic _related_ to Zeke. Since you're not interested in talking to me, why don't get Zeke so you can talk," He says, getting up. _How did this elevate so quickly?_

"Dr. Ea- Tobias! It was just a question!"

"I'll see you tonight," he says, not letting me say another word. He storms off and I'm pretty sure he'd shut the door loudly if he could. "Zeke she wants to talk to you,"

"Sure, ok," Zeke says walking in.

"Hi," I say.

"Hi, Tris. Do you know why he's so pissed off? He was fine just a few seconds ago,"

"I was just asking him some questions and he blew up,"

"Really? Huh, he's usually pretty calm,"

"I might be changing nurses soon," I slowly bring up.

"Cool, did he tell you who it was?"

"Someone named Shauna," his face lit up completely

"Really?" His whole tone and demeanor were altered. His face looks softer and happier and his tone was more gentle. I could've told him he single-handedly ended world hunger and.

"Yeah, Dr. Eaton told me that you were fond of her,"

"You know, Tris, I should probably talk to him. He's been having a hard time. His dad is like military parent strict and ever since the fitness program's been in place, he's been flooded with work,"

"Oh," I could hear static coming from his walkie-talkie.

"Pedrad! We need your help at the front. All patients in the mental facility need to be rounded up. Everyone in this section of the hospital. Get the doctors with your section. Dr. Matthews is now requiring all patients to take this new shot. And doctors. And all the staff," Part of my head wants not to believe what I'm hearing, the other part wants to stop it.

"Zeke,"

"I'll be right over. Tris, I have to go and you need to come with us,"

 **A/N: I'm off of hiatus. I'm a senior! This has been, well, pretty bad. I actually achieved the status of homeless but that's better now. I wanted to write something when I was in a good mood. Anyways, all I see is stress, stress, and more stress. Hope to update soon (2 weeks maybe?)!**

 **-L**


	14. Chapter 14

I walk with Zeke, aware of my surroundings. We're being rounded up. Hundreds and thousands of people, all in these lines. There are fifty different people giving shots to patients.

"Attention everyone. These shots are important. Everyone will be given one, no exceptions. Please continue in an orderly fashion and follow the security guards that direct you," I can hear Jeanine's voice being projected through the room.

"Tris!" Tobias runs up to me, leaving his spot in the line, "c' mon, you have to go"

"Four, I can't let you take her. Sorry, bro," Zeke says apologetically. Tobias grabs one of my arms and pulls me away from the line. I can feel another hand latch onto my arm.

"Let go," Tobias hisses. I watch as Zeke and Tobias stare each other down. It's probably the scariest thing I've ever seen. For a second, Tobias glances at me, as if he wants me to back him up. I look at the ground, not reaching either of their eyes.

"You know what, fine," Tobias snarls, dropping my arm. He looks like he wants to say more but he just shakes his head and walks away.

"Hey, _Dr. Eaton._ Get back in line," a mocking voice from behind him says. I study the man's face, it's familiar.

"I'm going to do whatever the fuck I want, Eric," Tobias spits out at him, storming away.

" _Tobias,"_ the room goes eerily quiet. As if everyone has stopped moving and breathing. The hospital staff stands straighter and stiffer, but they all seem to cower. The man's features are much like Tobias' but older and harder. Tobias stands still as if he's been stunned.

"Yes, sir," he says quietly.

"What are you doing here? I thought I told you to-" he stops mid-sentence, finally noticing the tension in the room and the quietness of both the patient and the staff. His eyes glance over all of them and at once the room is back to its normal chaos of the lines.

"Son, please follow the one, _simple_ , direction I have given you," he mutters something into Tobias's ear. Zeke's arm had dropped from my hand and he doesn't glance at Tobias. I scan the room, trying to find another person who sees what I'm seeing. Nobody looks at them or whispers about them. Only one person is watching them as I do, Eric. His look is smug and mocking. Eric sees me staring at him and smirks, mouthing the word " _Daddy Issues"_ slowing before looking back at Tobias and what could only be the real "Mr. Eaton". I drag my eyes away from them and look ahead. As we come closer to the front of the line, I can feel a sense of dread build in my stomach. I take a deep breathe, insistent on calming whatever was making me feel this way. Then, I can see her before I hear her. Her blond, short hair, stand out and her blue suit tells me that I should run.

"Next," she says, injecting the next patient with the clear liquid. Her voice is still sharp, demanding, and powerful, just how it has always been. Zeke senses my despair and gives me a look. I motion to Dr. Matthews, my heart rate accelerating. As the number of patients between us dwindles, I can feel the blood rush to my feet. Dizziness seems to overtake me so I grab Zeke's arm in an attempt to balance myself. I grasp his arm tightly, letting the dizziness pass, not realizing that I'm hurting him.

"Ow! Tris! Your claws are hurting me! Ouch! Do you even cut your nails!" He hisses at me. I blush, loosening my grip, seeing how my nails made little indents in his skin. Zeke examined them thoroughly in horror.

"Sorry," I said sheepishly.

"Sorry? You freaking tattooed me! Next time you plan on trying to escape, just use your nails. Damn, that hurt a lot,"

"I don't know my own strength?" I say, but it comes out as more of a question.

"Hello, Beatrice," I look up to see Dr. Matthews looking down on me.

"D-do-doctor-" I let a small yelp of pain out as she pulls my hair rather roughly away from my neck. The needle pierces my skin roughly and I hiss out in pain.

"Oops. I missed, I need to do it one more time. Hang in there," she says, a maliciously sweet smile painted on her face. I'm too frozen, with fear and vexation both holding me in different places, to notice how much her needle stings.

"Next!" she calls out and Zeke moves me from the line after he is also injected.

Uneasiness stirs in my stomach as I'm led back to my room. _Something is not right. Dr. Matthews was too happy._

Jeanine POV:

I throw away the shot and take off my gloves.

"You take over," I order my assistant. She nods and beckons for the next person to get the shot. I spent a long time engineering this shot. Over many tests, I can almost guarantee that it makes the amygdala, hippocampus, cerebellum, and the prefrontal cortex vulnerable. This allows for certain memories to be removed from the brain. This shot _was specifically_ designed to erase me. My relationship with Beatrice, my reputation, and everything else that has managed to deteriorate will be restored. They say you can't change the past but somehow I've been able to change the future. _Big day tomorrow. Everything back to normal._ I grab my phone and reach to contact the manager.

"Hello, Dr. Matthews," he says from across the phone.

"Move patient Beatrice Prior, 25, back to her old room please," I say calmly

"I'm not sure if I'm-"

"Beatrice has been put back under my care," I can hear him sigh heavily

"Fine. Will that be all?"

"Yes, bye,"

 _~ ONE HOUR LATER ~_

I go into Beatrice blue-walled room. She's no longer here. It seems like everything's been moved. A beautiful vase catches my eyes, holding one small, slightly wilted rose. I pick it up a smile. _Cute._ I take the rose out and throw it away. I wash out the vase and keep it for tomorrow. I'll keep it back in Dr. Eaton's office where it should belong. Tomorrow I'm going to be in control. I'm not going to make the same mistakes.

 **A/N: Aaaaaand I think I'm gonna stop here. School is so busy and I'm literally spending 50% of my time working when I'm not in school. I've been blasting LDR's new music and I'm pretty sure Tobias would be lying if he said he wasn't sick of it. Tobias said something really funny today but I'm not going to post it because I don't have a death wish. If you're really dying to know just PM me and (with Tobias's permission) I'll tell you what he said. Byeee!**

 **-L**


	15. Chapter 15

Jeanine POV:

I sigh. I can't keep Beatrice under my care all the time. I just need to make sure our relationship is more than golden. I need more time, a distraction for her. Just for a little while. I think about Dr. Eaton for a second. He couldn't be too much harm. He wouldn't trigger anything, he would just be her therapist like before but this time Beatrice will like me better. _No more mistakes._ I give my signature as approval. Beatrice was going to change doctors for a little while and I was going to plan. Plan for _our_ future.

Tris POV:

Two people lead me back to my old room.

"Why am I here?" I ask them looking at both of them quizzically.

"You were assigned to this room, again," the shorter one says. _No way Tobias is gonna put me back here._

"I don't wanna be back here," I complain. They put me inside and lock the door anyway.

"This is stupid," I mumble to myself. I hate this room. It's by the dementia part of the ward, the walls are grey, the bed is smaller and less comfy, there's no art, and no decor whatsoever. Last I checked, it was only about 5 pm but I'm feeling weirdly sleepy. As if my body wants me to go to sleep more than anything in this world. It's an odd feeling and I can feel myself making my way to the bed. I rub my eyes and lie down. The bed feels comfortable enough and almost comforting.

Dr. Eaton POV:

Something wrong, really wrong. I put about 2 cups of coffee in me and I'm on my third and yet I'm still tired. I have so many more patients to see today I can just bail on them. I place my head down on my desk and it's surprisingly comfortable. I glance at the clock. _6:25 pm._ Why am I so sleepy? I feel so old and it's annoying. A quick knock on my door causes me to jolt up.

"Come in," I say groggily.

"Dr. Eaton, there's a problem," the nurse says. It takes me a while to remember her name.

"What's wrong, Shauna?"

"Almost all the staff in the ward is sick, she yawns, "sorry, it's just I think I'm sick too. Everyone is really tired. Like falling asleep on desks tired. I don't know why. Even the patients are all in bed. Everyone in the ward. Not any of the patients are awake,"

"We can't leave the hospital unattended," I feel a yawn coming on but I resist it, "send everyone who's sick home if we have enough staff. You can go home. Drive safely,"

"Thank you, Dr. Eaton. There are a few in the hospital who are feeling fine though. If you're tired I'm pretty sure they would be fine with you leaving early,"

"Thanks. Bye," I say as she leaves. I blink sleepily and decide I'm not even being productive so there's no reason for me to be there.

 _~THE NEXT DAY~_

Beatrice POV:

My head hurts a lot More than usual. I hear a swift knock and my door swings open.

"Hello, Beatrice," Dr. Matthews says with a big smile. Part of me is happy to see her because of the company but another part of me is screaming with disgust. I'm not sure why I'm feeling so… social. It's not a feeling that I have. Dr. Matthews has always been my doctor and I've never felt the want to talk to her.

"Hello, Dr. Matthew,"

"I hope you're feeling ok," she says looking me up and down.

"I am, thank you. How are you?"

"I'm good but I have some sad news. I'm no longer going to be your doctor. I've been switched due to unfortunate circumstances. We have a few more hours left together, Beatrice," Dr. Matthews says with a smile that I almost feel is sincere. She dressed differently today. More motherly less… all business no fun.

"C'mon let's go for a walk inside the building," I stare at her for a few seconds, tempted to check her temperature. I blink slowly and she's still beckoning for me to come. _This is new._ I get up and smile.

"Let's go," I say eagerly. We walk around the hospital and I take it all in. So many people walking and talking and there's a slight buzz of energy. I catch someone's blue eyes. They're oddly familiar. Probably someone I've seen in the ward before. We sit down in a room and for a while, Dr. Matthews doesn't seem so _mean._ Her tidy, short hair looks more friendly and she's smiling a smile that doesn't yell the words "I WILL CONTROL YOU! BOW PEASANT".Ok, maybe she didn't give off that look completely. Still, she was usually controlling and to the point. Another thing has also changed. I feel happier today and I don't know why.

"We can't go outside so this was the best I could do," she says. My eyes are glued to the large window. Everything out there looks so… peaceful. I let out a large sigh.

"Beautiful, right?" she says, her smiling reaching her eyes. I can feel the pain from my head subsiding, and almost disappearing.

"It is," I say, looking at her. Something different. A _good_ different.

"Enjoy it," she says softly. We stare out the window for what feels like only a few minutes. Soon enough, she looks back at me with those same, caring eyes.

"We have to go to meet your new doctor, Beatrice," she says. Something strikes my heart and I almost feel something emotionally painful. I just nod and follow her out of the room. Why was she so nice today? Why did I feel so much for her today? Did she feel pity? Was the new doctor going to be really bad? Does she know the new doctor is gonna be really bad? I can feel anxiety bubbling up inside me as we walk to a new room.

"This is your new room," she says opening the door. I look inside and feel something strange. I've seen this before. I walk inside, admiring the blue walls and the bed that looks softer than my old one.

"Thank you," I say, my voice cracking. Something about this room is so _familiar_.

"I'll let you get adjusted while I wait for your doctor. We'll be saying our goodbyes soon,"

"Ok," is all I reply with. The door shuts softly and I can hear the small lock click. I inspect the piece of art on the wall. Ravens flying out of a cage. Suddenly, I can _feel_ something pushing into my head. Birds, lots of them, swooping down to attack me. I let out a small groan, something isn't right. My head hurts too much and all I can think about are birds. I stagger to the bed, holding my head in my hands. Then, it's gone and I'm stuck there gasping for breath, scared. _I've never had anything like that happen before. I could feel it. I swear I could feel it coming into my head._

Dr. Eaton POV:

I sit in my office, my head pounding. I let out a frustrated groan. I didn't even drink anything last night. Why am I having such a bad headache? Papers are flung everywhere on my desk and I can't seem to find anything I need. _This desk doesn't have enough space._ As I'm shuffling through papers I notice a small blue vase on my desk. Huh, don't remember putting that there or even owning anything like it. _No place for stuff like this here._ I sigh, pick it up, and throw it away. _Ignore the headache._ I tell myself over and over again. I organize my papers and the pain slowly goes away. I log onto my computer and check my schedule. I stand up abruptly. _A new patient today? How did that slip?_ I'm five minutes late already. _Shit._

 **A/N: I'm dying and drowning in school and work right now. I just want my senior year to be over and it's barely even started. Anyways, Tobias posted a one-shot on his account. It's pretty awesome… ZekexShauna check it out. How are you doing? I've decided to come up with Fast Chapter Opportunities. Basically, depending on my schedule you all will get a goal for like reviews and stuff. On a super-duper busy week like this one, I might ask for something really out of the range I'm expecting. On a week that's chill, I'll ask for something a little more than normal. If we complete the goal, I will post a chapter the next day 99.9% guaranteed. If not, no sweat. I'll update at my regular pace at about every two weeks. There might not be one every update. Fast Chapter Opportunity: 110 reviews ←If this was an ok-ish busy week I would have asked for 101 buuuut, it's insanely busy so I'm doing something that's wayyy out of range. Have a nice day :)**

 **-L**


	16. Chapter 16

Beatrice POV:

I can hear a knock on the door, pulling me out of my thoughts. Jeanine and another man enter. His shirt is pristine and not a wrinkle in the fabric is present. Something about his eyes are so different yet so familiar. It's startling in ways I can't comprehend.

"I-I'm Dr. Eaton," he says, stuttering at first, but then clearing his voice.

"Beatrice, this will be your new doctor. Temporarily,"

"Hi," I say breathily. I've seen him before. My head starts to hurt and pounds so much that I think I might pass out. Not caring that both Dr. Matthews and Dr. Eaton are watching, I grab my head.

"It hurts," I whisper, barely able to make a sentence. I can feel my vision blurring.

"There's something wrong," Dr. Eaton says. For a second I think he's talking about me but I look at him to find him cradling his head in his hands. For a second, my vision turns an unusual shade of blue. He controls his pain better than I do, he stops cradling his head and looks up. He's still obviously in pain but he ignores it.

"Can you tell me what's wrong?" he says taking a small step towards me.

"It hurts," I say, barely whispering.

"Can you describe the pain?" he asks gently.

"It feels like my head is going to explode,"

"I see. We might want to get you some medicine for that, ok? Have you been drinking enough water?"

"Yes,"

"Have you been getting enough sleep? Sometimes just closing your eyes will help with the pain," I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block out the pain. It helps a little. He says some more things, but I block my ears with my hands, blurring and distorting his voice, making him sound far away. I can feel my headache going away.

"I think it's you," I say, my eyes still closed and ear blocked off. He says something, but I can't really make it out. I can feel someone gently taking my hands off my ears. My eyes fly open, watching Dr. Eaton looking me straight in the eye. My head starts pounding again.

"Can you tell me what you mean when you said 'I think it's you'? Dr. Matthews, can you go and ask someone to get some water," He asks calmly. Is this what they mean when people say they can see stars? My head hurts and it's more pain than I've ever experienced before.

"I think-" I begin, my head hurting and my vision going fuzzy. I can feel the blood rushing to my feet.

"I think I'm going to pass out," I say, finding myself losing consciousness.

 **WHILE UNCONCIOUS (Dreaming State) :**

" _What the hell was that, Tris?" A man says, pulling my arm. Everything feels distorted and almost unreal. What's happening?_

" _I…" My breath comes in a hiccup. "I didn't-"_

" _Get yourself together! This is pathetic." He yells in my face. I squint up and make up some vaguely familiar features. Dr. Eaton? Then everything is changing._

" _One for the money, two for the show," I smile as I watch Elvis singing on the stage._

" _Elvis is king, don't you think, Tris?" a tall, dark-skinned, attractive man asks me, bumping my side with his elbow. His face goes all funny and unfamiliar and everything seems to be changing again._

" _Wake up!" I lady yells at me. I can't make out her face, but she sounds desperate. I can feel her shaking me. I feel so dizzy. What's going on?_

 **BACK TO CONSCIOUSNESS:**

"You need to wake up. Beatrice? Are you ok?" I hear a soft voice murmuring. I laying flat on the floor, unable to open my eyes. Dr. Eaton is crouching over me, putting his ear next to my mouth for a few seconds.

"She's breathing," he announces. He begins loosening the tie on my pants. I try speaking, wondering what the _hell_ he's doing but fail. I blink a few times, clearing the black spots for my vision.

"She's awake," he calls out, with a small sigh. With all my power I force my eyes open.

"What's going on?" I ask, moving my hands to fix my pants.

"Just a second. I'll explain everything in a second. Can you help me get you on the bed?" Dr. Eaton asks softly. He gently lifts me up as if I were weightless and puts me on the bed. He puts another pillow under my head and sighs.

"Are you feeling ok?" he asks, rubbing his head.

"My head doesn't hurt so much anymore," I say. I can feel my memories from the dream rushing back to me all at once.

"That's good," he says with a weak smile, "you passed out,"  
"Yeah," I say. _Do I know him from somewhere?_ The question lingers in my mind, tempting me to ask him.

"Ok. If you feel like passing out again, put your head between your knees and sit. Make sure to loosen anything that might be restricting and press the call button, ok? Passing out can be very dangerous," I nod but a name pops into my head, ' _Dr. Eaton mode'_

"Ok,"

"We're gonna have to check some stuff now, ok? Just do what the nurses tell you to do and it should be done quickly," he says smiling kindly, his eyes soft. Something about it just makes me blush as I nod.

"Ok,"

"Just between you and me, I used to pass out at home like that all the time when I was a kid. Not for the same reasons, but still," he says with a slightly shaky laugh, "you're not alone," Another name pops into my head but I forget it as soon as I remember it. Something with a 'T'

After about half an hour of being checked, I'm taken back to my room. As we're walking back we're stopped as people run through.

"Go! He passed out in his office! Out of the way!" A person who I can only assume is a nurse yells.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Nothing," the nurse says with a forced smile, "everything is fine,"

Dr. Eaton POV:

I clench my head, letting out a large sound of pain. I get up, stumbling around in my office. Bleary blackness clouds my vision and I try sitting down to get my head between my knees but I can feel myself falling already in a state that brings back too much of my childhood.

 **WHILE UNCONCIOUS (Dreaming State) :**

" _Delete them. If they aren't deleted or completely gotten rid of, I will make sure you never get a job again. Don't you dare tell anyone the results," I mutter quietly to my nurse. The nurse's eyes seem to widen as she quickly types something and sighs. I don't know what I want to be deleted. Then suddenly I'm walking to my desk, papers in my hands. I open the secret compartment in my drawer and place the papers in it. I stare at the papers and the words seem to change every few seconds, with a few words recurring: Beatrice Prior, Divergent._

" _No," I mutter to no one in particular. Suddenly I'm thrown out of that reality and I can see my father._

" _You," he growls, "y-you're divergent," he spits and rage fills his face. I squeeze my eyes shut. This can't be happening, I'm stronger than him now._

" _Daddy issues," I can see Eric's mouth, smirking at me while glancing at another girl as my father pulls me off._

 **BACK TO CONSCIOUSNESS:**

"Dr. Eaton!" I hear a sharp voice say. My eyes fling open and I turn red.

"Are you ok?" Tori says, "I heard a pretty loud thud. He might have a concussion," she says to another nurse.

"I'm good, Tori," I look around at the panicked yet collected faces staring at me, "So, um, what exactly happened?" I ask.

"You passed out or fell and blacked out," Tori says, "are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I say brushing it off, slightly embarrassed that I passed out.

"Listen, Four. You better tell me what actually happened later, ok?" she says in a hushed voice. I nod at her as she gives more orders. _Well, time to get checked up too._

 **A/N: I cannot explain how many things have happened in the short period of two weeks that I am allowing myself to be ok with the fact that this chapter is a little bit late. One of my guy friends just proposed to his girlfriend (he's only 20). Oh my god, I always thought he would be the last to get married but I guess not. His girlfriend is the sweetest, most 'I'll put you in your fucking place if you're wrong' person in this world (aka they're a perfect match because he needs to be told to stfu sometimes). Anyways, Imma continue being single. I actually have plans this weekend (for the first time in forever) and my nerd group (and Tobias who refuses to be a part of it but still cosplays) will be cosplaying as Voltron characters cuz why not. ALMOST FORGOT! Guys, this story has 100 reviews. YESSSSSS THANK YOUUUUUUUUUUU! I honestly didn't think it would be that successful in like 15 chapters. Anyways, hope this chapter was good? Byeeeeeeeeeee**

 **-L**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Hi! Sorry this isn't an update :/ I got sick. Like really, really sick. Like stuck in bed for two weeks sick throwing up everything sick. Getting sick is a lot more stressful when your mom isn't taking are of you. I PROMISE to update as soon as possible. I have soooo much homework and I am just only getting better. Thanks for your patience :) My schedule has been really jam-packed with balancing work and school and everything else. I've really had a hard time wanting to get up in the morning and do stuff. Anyway, Imma try to update as soon as I have time (which will probably be in a few days). Thanks for all the support 3**


	18. Chapter 18

Dr. Eaton POV:

I make my way to my office, walking quickly. _Something isn't right._ I nervously push my hair back with my right hand while I open my office door. I stand still for a moment, before turning around and locking it. I walk towards my desk and sit down. _Something just isn't right._ Thoughts flow through my head, questioning everything. Trying to grasp on to everything I can remember. _I can remember yesterday. What happened after that? What's been happening these past fucking months?_ I rack my brain and let out a frustrated groan. I shove my hand in my pocket and grab a small key. I open up my drawer and unlock a small compartment, big enough to hold paper or smaller objects. I pull it open with a large amount of force, my frustration egging me on. I pull out the nearest packet, flipping through the pages, turning giddy when I see the dates. I ignore all the other texts and just focus on the date for a solid few seconds. My enthusiasm fades as I see the rest.

 _Subject 1: Beatrice Prior_

 _Results: Inconclusive_

 _Divergent_

 _When did I make these tests?_ I glance at the impressive times she had coming in and out of the simulations. Without thinking, I pull out the rest of the papers. _What is this? Why are there so many. Why can I not remember doing this?_ I carefully put them back, regretting taking them all out at once. I pull out my phone and call Tori.

"Tori," I say once she picks up.

"Do you need something, Four?" she asks.

"Can you come by my apartment later tonight. Maybe at 7:00? We need to talk. More than what happened today. There's something wrong,"

"Are you ok?" she asks, hints of worry in her voice.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just please," I say.

"Ok, I'll be there. 7:00, right?"

"Yeah, thanks,"

"Ok, bye,"

"Bye," I say hanging up.

~ TIME SKIP TO 7:00 ~

I stand by my door, waiting. I have the papers I found earlier in my hand and I'm almost shaking. After what seems like a long time, the bell rings and I pull the door open. Tori looks at me, the papers, and hesitantly walks in.

"Hey, Four. Everything good?" she asks, slowly walking inside.

"Yes! I'm mean no. I mean yes but there's something wrong, Tori. I feel like I've forgotten something. Something big." I say.

"Have you had enough sleep lately?" she asks.

"Yes!" I snap, "There's just something really important,"

"Can you please explain?" she asks.

"Can you tell me what's happened over the last, like, 7-ish months?"

"Of course I can," she says rolling her eyes.

"Ok, go," I say. I _can't_ be crazy.

"Without prep? Gee thanks. Anyways, we had that one patient with…" she trails off.

"See?" I say.

"Damn, Four! Give a second to think," she says through gritted teeth.

"Fine," I say. So I wait. After ten minutes, Tori still says nothing.

"I'm blanking," she finally says.

"No, you're not. I can't remember anything either,"

"Look, Four, I didn't come over to be tested. I thought you wanted to talk,"

"I did want to talk!"

"Ok, so can you explain what happened earlier today? Why you passed out?"

"I don't know! A patient passed out earlier today too. It was weird, I was completely fine one minute but then my head started to hurt. Like really, really, hurt,"

"Ok," she says slowly, "Four, you need to tell me honestly, how much sleep have you been getting?"

"I'm not fucking tired!" I yell.

"That wasn't the question,"

"I've been averaging from 6-8 hours a night," I say.

"Ok. I know you're not someone who gets hurt easily. Can you describe the pain?"

"I just hurt towards the center of my head and then the pain began to spread. It was consistent and didn't go away,"

"When did it start?"

"I don't know, when I first walked into the patient's room, maybe?"

"Was this the patient that had also passed out?"

"Yes,"

"Ok, so it might be a sickness of some kind that could've spread,"

"This was my first time seeing her!"

"Tobias," she says softly. She rarely ever calls me by my name. "Take a few days off, rest a little bit. You're working really hard and you're like the youngest doctor I've ever seen. You went through a seven year medical school program and didn't even take a break after. You've worked so, so hard. Look, right now I just think you're really stressed. I'll do a report on what's been happening the last seven months, ok?" I open my mouth, wanting to respond harshly, but I hold it back and just let out a sigh.

"Ok, but, please, just read through these reports. I made you a copy. I don't remember doing any of these tests. I just met the patient today. Don't share them with anybody," I say handing her a copy of the thick packet, "Oh, and you don't have to make a report. I just can't remember anything and… I don't know why," I say.

"Ok, I should be going now. Take care of yourself, I'll let myself out," she says. I watch as she leaves. The door shuts and I'm left thinking. _What if I'm just crazy? What if it's only me who can't remember. What if I'm sick?_

 **A/N: Sorry! Like, sorry! Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry! This chapter is a little bit short but I've had to work myself a lot lately. It's been so hard :( Anyways, here it is. After, like, forever. Tobias has been working on a small animation which I think is pretty cute. Actually, I can't call it an animation but it's really close to one. He making digital art but he's kinda stubborn on making it with a mouse. I have a hard time clicking on the right thing with my mouse so that's pretty amazing. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this.**

 **-L**


	19. Chapter 19

Jeanine POV:

I see Tori walking in for her night shift, clasping some papers that she seems to be quite invested in. _Too_ invested in.

"Wu, come here," I demand, wanting to know exactly what she's looking at. The way she jumps up when I call her name is… interesting.

"Yes, Dr. Matthews," she says, carrying the papers behind her back as she approaches me.

"What are those papers?" Tori's face turns white for a second before she regains herself.

"Oh, they're nothing. I just had to print out some files for the mail room," The way her eyes widen slightly tell me she's lying.

"Are you lying to me?" I demand, my voice growing louder.

"No," she says firmly, looking me straight in the eye.

"Give them to me," I say, holding her gaze.

"I was told to take them down to the mailroom immediately," she says, and slowly tries to back away, bringing appears in front of her once more. In one swift movement, I walk forward and snatch the papers out of her hand.

"Hey!" she yells and for a second, I swear she's about to hurt me. Then, I see her hold herself back.

"Tori Wu, don't raise your voice to your superior again," I say, my eyes narrowing. I walk with the papers back to my office. _Tori would never be interested in simple 'mailroom' papers. She barely glances at our reports._ As soon as I sit down I begin reading the paper. _Beatrice Prior._

"What," I say aloud quietly as I flip through the pages. _He did tests on her? She responded to them?_ A certain rage fills me, one that I don't think I've ever known. _How could that new doctor get her to cooperate? How are there so many tests? I'm a failure. I didn't do it._ I pick up my phone and call Dr. Eaton.

"Dr. Eaton, please come to the hospital immediately, thank you," I say as soon as he picks up.

"Ok, I'll be there in ten minutes," he somewhat groggily.. From the sound of is voice, he'd probably had been sleeping. Someone knocks on my door three times sharply.

"Come in," I say as Nita, one of my most trusted and reliable companions enters. She was one of the few people who wasn't injected

"Dr. Matthews, we have a problem," Nita says nervously.

"What could have possibly gone wrong?" I ask, letting out a sigh.

"The injection. It's faulty. It's messing with the wrong part of the brain and are giving subjects migraines. Subjects also have reported strange hallucinations. Subjects have also regained their memory and have begun absolutely freaking out,"

"What? The injection was flawless," I say standing up.

"Not completely. The first test subjects have fully regained their memory. The serum is only good for about a week or even a few days for some before patients slowly start regaining their memory," Everything starts to go foggy for a second and I'm forced to sit down. Anger and sadness both cloud my vision.

"Nita, round up all the patients near Beatrice Prior's ward section as well as their nurses. Bring them to the common area," I say. _I have to fix this. I have to fix this. I have to fix this._

"Are you sure that's a good idea, Dr. Matthews?" Nita asks quietly.

"Do it now," I demand, slamming my fist against the table. Nita quickly walks out the door. _I'm going to fix this. Everything will be fine._ I immediately crouch down to the ground and move my chair as I pull up a small compartment from the floor. I pull it all the way up, revealing a gun I designed myself. _Lab Rule #567, dispose of failed test subjects. I'm going to fix this. Everything will be fine._

Zeke POV:

I lean against the wall and let out a sigh. _This is bo-o-ring._ I'm not even position in the same spot as Shauna, which sucks. What also sucks is my headache which hasn't gone away for the last few hours.

"Get your patients and get to the common area immediately everyone!" Nita says, prancing through the hallways. I poke my head out, watching as the nurses groan about it.

Then, I see her. Shauna rolls her eyes and rolls a patient on a wheelchair to the common room. Disregarding the job I get paid to do ( _It's not disregarding my job if I'm trying to ensure the safety of the patients which are all being moved)_ , I walk over to her.

"Hey, Shauna," I say smiling brightly.

"Hi," she says, he face brightening.

"C'mon everyone! Hustle! All patients in this hall need to be rounded up in the common area! I need the nurses their too so once you're done, get over there," Nita says loudly.

"What's going on?" I ask.

"No fucking idea," Shauna replies.

"Guys!" I can hear a voice from behind me say.

"Hey, Four," I say as I see Four speedwalking towards us, his hair a little messy.

"What's going on?" he asks loudly, glaring at Nita.

"Your superior has required all patients in this hall to be rounded up in the common area," Nita replies.

"What's with the ' _your superior'_ shit?" I ask Four.

"I don't know,"

It takes a while, but after some time, all the patients are rounded up in the common area rather neatly in a line. Four and I are leaned against a wall next to the door. In all there are probably about 60-70 people in the room

"Where's my patient?" Four asks, panicked, looking through the crowd.

"Right there," I say pointing literally directly in front of him.

"Oh. Right," he says. I spot Shauna immediately standing behind the patients, trying to soothe one.

"She was right in front of you," I mutter.

"Zeke, they're locking the doors," Four says.

"What?"

"Look!" I turn around and Four is right, they're locking them from the other side. I scan for more exits and see that all the doors are being locked. _What is she doing_

"Attention!" Says a harsh voice.

"Fuck it's Dr. Matthews," I mutter to Four, "who are the five men standing next to her?"

"That's not our biggest problem right now. Do you have a key for the doors?" Four whispers.

"Uh, yeah," As quietly as I can I put my hand in my pocket and slowly glance down, taking the right key off the chain. I slip it to Four.

"This one is for the door next to us,"

"You might be wondering why you have been gathered here as it's for a very simple reason. You are all a part of a much, much bigger project that unfortunately has failed. As you know, lab rules required failed test subjects to be _disposed_ of,"

The room grows quieter, as if we all know what's coming next but we all say nothing. No one moves as Jeaninea and her men pull out their guns, everyone just stares, except for Four who unlocked the door. As soon as it clicks unlocked, Jeanine's eyes fling to us and bullets are fired towards the patients. The first patient to be shot at is Four's and I watch as all six people's bullets hit her all in different places, as if this was planned.

It's chaos as everyone moves for the exit, some nurses abandon their patients as other quickly push their wheelchairs towards the exits. The patients that are left behind are easily picked off. I watch in horror as Jeanine shoots them so quickly. It all happens in about thirty seconds. Pulling out my gun, I shoot the first man square in the chest. Then the second one in the same place. I aim my gun at Jeanine, not to kill her, just to injure her enough so she can't maneuver the gun. I watch as Shauna wheels her patient out the door next to me and then turns back around to go and try to save the patients still inside. I put down my gun and yell,

"Get fuck back out, Shauna," roughly grabbing her arm and pulling her towards the exit.

"There are still people inside!" she screams as she pulls it back and runs inside. Things seem to happen slowly as she makes her way to Four's patient. I can almost see the bullet from Jeanine's gun fly into her back. I watch, as she falls to the ground, hitting her head. I aim at Jeanine again, but this time, wanting to kill her. My bullet hits the side of her head, causing her to fly and land on her side, dead. Other security guards have managed to enter and take down the rest of the men. As the police and ambulance flood the room, I slink against the wall and sit down, watching as they take people away, watching as they take Shauna away. I see them not even bothering to consider some people alive, like Four's patient. Nobody notices I'm there. I don't even know where the fuck Four is. Things are quiet after everyone leaves the room, the only sounds are screaming doctors and worried families. I probably sit there for hours, letting myself replay Shauna getting shot in the back over and over again. Then it dawns on me, I _killed_ someone. Even if it was Jeaning, I still killed her. No one she could've survived.

Red still outlines the floor in some areas and the plush chairs will have to be thrown away. I get up for the first time in hours and walk out of the room. As soon as I can, I change out of my uniform and drive to another section of the hospital, where these victims were most likely taken.

"Where's Shauna?" I croak as soon as I reach the front desk.

"I'm sorry?" the lady asks.

"The shooting in the common room. Where's Shauna?" I can even describe how weak my voice sounds. I don't even care.

"Are you related to patient?"

"No, but I have to see her,"

"I'm sorry, sir. Only family members are allowed to visit," Knowing better than to argue, I call Four, realizing that I have no idea where he is. Or if he's ok.

"Four?" I ask as soon as he picks up.

"Zeke! Where have you been? I-I thought we lost you too," Four says, emotional flowing through his voice.

"Four, where are you?"

"In the hospital. Where the victims are," he says quietly.

"I'm here too. Can you let me see Shauna, please?"

"She died, Zeke," Four mutters, for a second, I'm pretty sure my heart stops.

"Shauna?" I croak out.

"N-no, no, Beatrice," he said. Relief floods me but then I realize that it doesn't mean Shauna is fine.

"I'm so sorry," I say, not even realizing I had begun to cry.

"I'll meet you in the lobby, ok?" Four says, something about his voice is unusually pained. He comes to the lobby quickly. I walk over to him, hugging him tightly, something we don't do often, or ever. He's surprised at first, but he gently returns the hug.

"Dude, you don't know how I happy I am to see you," I say, stepping back.

"Zeke, I saw Shauna. I don't think you should see her," Four says immediately.

"Why not? I want to," I demand quietly and weakly.

"She's… paralyzed from the waist down. The doctors think its permanent. She also has a concussion,"

"S-she c-can't walk? I told her not to go in! I told her going in was dangerous!" I cried, holding my head in my hands.

"Do you want to see her?" Four ask, oddly stoic.

"Y-yeah," I said, preparing myself for the worst as he led me through the halls. When I first saw her, she wasn't totally unrecognizable. I could still see bits of here past the tubes and bandages.

"She's gonna be ok, right?" I ask Four.

"She'll be fine," he says, looking at his hands.

"She'll be fine," I mutter quietly, repeating what Four said, and trying to let myself believe it.

 **A/N: That's all folks. Getting this chapter out was really, really hard. I've had writers block for the last month and I'm really sorry if you don't like the way this ended. Thanks for reading and guess I can finally change this story to 'completed'. I can't believe I wrote this over a span of a year to be honest. Life if so so so busy right now. Anyways, have a good one and thanks for sticking around :)**

 _ **Love,**_

 _ **-L**_


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